• Herr Woland
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    673 months ago

    If dogs go to heaven, then what do they eat there?

    • @muntedcrocodile
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      583 months ago

      Doggy heaven is squirrel hell its a very efficient system.

    • @[email protected]
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      113 months ago

      Would anyone or anything in heaven eat? Hunger is but a manifesting of the unimmaculaticity of flesh.

      • @eatthecake
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        93 months ago

        Well done. A google search results in zero hits for unimmaculaticity.

        • @[email protected]
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          43 months ago

          Thanks, it is fun to play with language. I almost went for the more boring “maculate”.

          I find something comedic about a Germanesque mash of prefixes and suffixes. Maybe one day I’ll stumble across a newfangled word that can live in the cupboard of our collective vocabulary.

    • @[email protected]
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      43 months ago

      Nothing. They do nothing but sit at the feet of god’s throne and worship him for all eternity.

    • @surewhynotlem
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      -353 months ago

      Cats. Cats are evil and go to hell. Their hell is to be food for heaven’s carnivores.

          • @Psychodelic
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            -83 months ago

            Cats are notorious dicks. Why act surprised? 🙀

            • @ThatWeirdGuy1001
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              113 months ago

              Meanwhile I’ve owned dozens of cats and no dogs and have more scars from dogs than cats

              • @[email protected]
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                63 months ago

                I bet if the cats weighed 90 lbs that’d be a different ratio but the lack of opportunity is still a point in their favor.

                No housecat is going to maul a child if they jump your fence either.

                • @[email protected]
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                  43 months ago

                  I bet if the cats weighed 90 lbs that’d be a different ratio but the lack of opportunity is still a point in their favor.

                  Those claws can hurt you man, they’re sharp as hell, but they choose not to use them

        • @muntedcrocodile
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          53 months ago

          In aus at least cats are pests that kill baby birds are single handedly responsible for putting hundreds of speicies on the endagered spieces list and have helped many go extinct so maybe a cat didnt hurt him maybe a cat just hurt the enviroment he loved.

          • Johanno
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            03 months ago

            Yeah cats kill birds like no other. They help us humans to extinct a few more species, best bros ever.

            Doesn’t matter, for each dead bird we breed 100 chicken that get produced into nuggets.

            • @muntedcrocodile
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              -33 months ago

              Those billions of chickens wouldnt exist if it wasnt for humans WE ARE their evolutinary niche we are the very reason they exist. And well we aint making chickens extinct are we.

              • @chetradley
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                23 months ago

                Hell yeah bro. The only reason those chickens get to live a grueling two months inside a hot, windowless shed caked in filth, barely able to stand because they’ve been bred to grow so large is because of us humans. You’re welcome chickens.

                • @muntedcrocodile
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                  13 months ago

                  What about those poor bacteria living in our assholes in a windowless gut caked in filth unable to stand is because co-evolution with humans your welcome shit eating bacteria.