• key
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    64 months ago

    Are they… fully functional? Urinating as a stegopenus would be messy but bleeding from my face monthly would be worse. The risk of getting pregnant and having my brain displaced by a growing fetus sounds horrifying. So if they’re wired up to the related anatomy I’ll go with dick. If it’s just the singular organ I’ll go with vagina and get really into head coverings

  • @SkyezOpen
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    64 months ago

    I’ll take the dicks. I will whip off my shirt and unleash a devastating torrent of piss if threatened.

    • @[email protected]OPM
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      24 months ago

      Your shirts won’t fit well. And imagine recling against anything and your back balls hurt. Chairs are impossible!

      • @SkyezOpen
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        34 months ago

        Tight fitting undershirts should keep them in check. Block of foam, cut a hole down the spine for chairs.

        • @[email protected]OPM
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          24 months ago

          Are you shaving your back balls or not? This seems like an important question.

          Also are you a back sleeper or a side sleeper. If you’re a back sleeper there’s issue again

          • Rhynoplaz
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            24 months ago

            Woah. There was no mention of testicles above. That’s a game changer.

            Is there a set for each penis? Or one sack to rule them all?

            The only thing worse than itchy balls, are itchy balls in the spot you just can’t reach.

            • @[email protected]OPM
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              14 months ago

              Each dick has an assigned sack. Maybe we could then have an extra sack to rule them all but that feels unnecessary

          • @SkyezOpen
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            24 months ago

            Think I’d opt for laser hair removal. Much easier.

            Back sleeper, but I’d just get a California king cuddle mattress and turn it sideways.

  • @Intheflsun
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    54 months ago

    One makes you “fuck face”, the other makes you stegodickonbackasaurus. I know my vote.

  • @edgemaster72
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    44 months ago

    Broke: sucking your own dick

    Woke: fucking your own forehead

  • @over_clox
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    34 months ago

    Such a difficult choice…

    Why not both?

    • @[email protected]OPM
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      34 months ago

      Opening the third eye on your forehead while the back gets erections would look like a superhero power up.

  • @[email protected]
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    4 months ago

    Everyday life would be hard if you had anything lewd growing out of your face. I do wonder what it’s like to have a vulva, though.

  • @retrospectology
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    14 months ago

    The latter are probably easier to have removed surgically. (No fun, I know)

    • @SkyezOpen
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      54 months ago

      Donate them to trans men! Everyone wins!