• @cornshark
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      -61 month ago

      Help how do I give Lemmy Gold

      • Track_Shovel
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        1401 month ago

        We do not do that here. We do NOT give monetized awards or bring trite rituals here. SPRAY SPRAY

        • @5765313496
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          221 month ago

          Maybe it’s not really for the best, but I feel like it should be good to show support for the community that brought a comment. Maybe a (honor system) pledge to donate to the instance of the commentor or the instance of the poster?

        • @shneancy
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          -21 month ago

          then don’t think with money!

          what if after we made 20 posts or 100 comments we could give one post/comment gold?

          that’d be fun!

          • @IzzyScissor
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            311 month ago

            That encourages bot or otherwise low-effort comment spamming which we also don’t want.

            • @shneancy
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              51 month ago

              let me dream that at least one online community has the decency to not try to grind the fun away out of a simple feature

              or make it upvotes then, 200 post upvotes & 500 comment upvotes

          • Track_Shovel
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            121 month ago

            It would only promote karma whoring. I mean, I’m bad enough already, do you guys actually want to incentivize me?

            • @shneancy
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              41 month ago

              do people actually care that much about upvotes?

            • @Death_Equity
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              21 month ago

              I’d incentivize Flying_Squid or SatansMaggotyCumFart, not you though.

      • @Pacmanlives
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        31 month ago

        I believe they are called Winks on Lemmy

  • @kryptonianCodeMonkey
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    1251 month ago

    A great adventure is waiting for you ahead. Hurry onward Ladybug, or you will soon be dead. The journey before you may be long and filled with woe. But you must escape the gay man’s ass, or your tale can’t be told.

    Ladybug, Ladybug, Ladybug, Ladybug!

    Ladybug’s journey is distant, far and vast! To find his way out of a gay man’s ass! The road ahead is filled with danger and fright! But push onward Ladybug with all of your might!

    The Sparrow Prince lies somewhere way up ahead! Don’t look back Ladybug, or you will soon be dead! Ladybug, Ladybug, the time is growing late. Slow down now, and seal your fate.

    Take the magic helmet-torch to help you light the way, there’s still a lot of ground to cross inside the man so gay! Ahead of you lies adventure, and your strength still lies within! Freedom from the ass of doom is the treasure you will win!

    Ladybug came to the stomach dark… Near the depths of the lungs and heart…

    Catatafish of the stomach’s cove!

    Catatafish’s riddle will soon be told!

    Ladybug has made it out, his tale is nearly through!

    Now that you’re the beetle king has more adventures to go on! Fly away to faraway lands and to the setting sun! So many enemies and battles yet to fight! For Ladybug the Beetle King’s tale is told throughout the night!

    Lay-Lay-Ladybug Ladybug Lady-Ladybug Ladybug, Laid-lay-Ladybug, Beetle King.

      • @[email protected]
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        261 month ago

        In the episode, “The Death Camp of Tolerance”, Mr. Garrison inserts Lemmiwinks into Mr. Slave’s anus with the hope that he’ll get fired. Lemmiwinks then travels through Mr. Slave’s digestive system to reach freedom.

        Episode s06e14

  • @[email protected]
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    1081 month ago

    That looks like more like an Asian Beetle than a typical Lady Bug. Those bastards will crawl into any crack or crevice they can squeeze themselves into to find a place to over-winter. They’re annoying, they smell like gross musty shit, and they will bite you given the opportunity.

    So while this is the first time I’ve seen one in someone’s colon, I’m not completely shocked either. In fact, it’s kind of “on brand”.

    • @Shard
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      411 month ago

      That is one hardy mofo.

      Before any sort of colonoscopy, they give you a days worth of liquid laxatives that you need to drink and you will spend the better part of the day before your procedure shitting what feels like a grown man worth of shit.

      Only then will the colon look as clean as it does in the picture.

      That damn bug survived all that. Either that or he climbed in a nice clean colon after all the shit was evacuated.

      • @[email protected]
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        21 month ago

        the colon would be evacuated not the shit … shit cannot be evacuated.

        i mean if we are splitting hairs about how bugs end up in someone’s trumpet we might as well blow the melody in tune.

  • @[email protected]
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    471 month ago

    Now we just need to know how many of these crawl up our bums like the amount of spiders we allegedly eat per year.

    • @AnimePhantasm
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      51 month ago

      I love how much of the article is just explaining what a ladybug is.

    • @gibmiser
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      371 month ago

      This is not my beautiful house! This is not my beautiful wife!

    • @[email protected]
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      331 month ago

      Pretty sure it didn’t survive a trip through stomach acid.

      Did you ever find a bug on a vegetable in the market?

      🤔

      • @[email protected]
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        71 month ago

        Maybe

        Granted, I think a human stomach is more difficult to traverse than a frog, and it’s more likely that it came in the back door. I’m just not willing to rule it out.

      • @[email protected]
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        11 month ago

        I vote food. There must be some unlikely placement along a meal that allows it to spend minimal time in contact with the acid.

    • @Sludgehammer
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      231 month ago

      My best guess is that it was on some of the equipment and somehow got transferred in during the colonoscopy.

    • @InverseParallax
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      181 month ago

      Oh dude just fuck you for adding this to the universe.

        • @[email protected]
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          211 month ago

          The story goes that during the RNC, gay prostitutes are in high demand. There is one such guy who claims to have serviced Lindsay Graham’s anus and said that it was peppered with raised moles, which Graham lovingly refered to as his “little ladybugs”.

          Allegedly.

    • @[email protected]
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      111 month ago

      🎵He anally inserted a spider to eat the fly; I don’t know why he inserted the fly; perhaps he’ll die🎵

    • ...m...
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      51 month ago

      …that’s some clever gastroetymology…

    • @elfin8er
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      1 month ago

      Oh you silly goose!

  • @Illogicalbit
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    151 month ago

    If that ladybug makes it out, it’ll have one hell of a story to share with its fellow bugs.

    Sounds like a great writing prompt actually.

    • @tehmics
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      51 month ago

      Yeah it’d almost be like if a person got swallowed by a whale or something. Someone should write a book about it.

  • Erasmus
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    131 month ago

    Truly a shitpost.

  • @anubis119
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    111 month ago

    I remember this level from The Fractured But Whole.