• @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    English
    449 minutes ago

    Imagine if we just didn’t grow them in the first place since clearly people don’t want to eat them anyway…

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    English
    111 hour ago

    An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were travelling abroad and needed a place to sleep for the night. They stopped at a farm and asked the farmer if they could sleep there. The farmer said “Yes, you can. But all of you must promise not to have sex with my beautiful daughter.” They all solemnly agreed and were shown to their room for the night.

    One by one though, each of them was overcome by temptation and sneaked down the hall to farmer’s daughter’s bedroom to have their wicked way with her.

    I’m the morning they came downstairs and were greeted by the farmer. “Good morning!” he said, “I hope you all slept well. Take a basket each and go out and pick something from my farm to eat for breakfast”. Being very hungry from their travels they all eagerly went out to look for their favourite food.

    The first to return was the Englishman. The farmer was waiting for him - with a loaded shotgun. “I know what you did last night!” shouted the farmer, pointing his gun at the Englishman. The Englishman threw his hands up in the air, dropping the basket of strawberries he’d picked for breakfast. “Bend over and put those strawberries up your arse and let that be a lesson to you!” The Englishman did as he was told and pushed the strawberries up his bum. Seeing that the farmer was satisfied the Englishman ran out the door and off into the distance.

    Next to return was the Scotsman. “What did you pick for breakfast young man?” asked the farmer. “I picked carrots” answered the Scotsman. “Well put them up your arse you dirty bastard!” screamed the farmer, pulling out the shotgun “I know what you did last night!” “Please dont shoot me sir!” Cried the Scotsman, as he painfully pushed each of the carrots up his bum before making a break for it and running out of the house.

    Last to return was the Irishman, carrying his basket on his back. “You dirty lying son of a bitch!” screamed the farmer “You had sex with my daughter last night!” “Now tell me what you picked for breakfast.”

    The Irishman heaved his basket onto the floor with a thud.

    They both looked down at its contents.

    “I picked a pumpkin sir.”

  • idunnololz
    link
    English
    245 minutes ago

    Time to ties some mini gourds into an anal bead 😔

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    English
    10
    edit-2
    2 hours ago

    complain about throwing a billion pumpkins into landfill

    Order a billion tonnes of plastic shite off Temu which then breaks, and throw it into landfill

    Fucking keep chucking the pumpkins, guys

  • @Jimbabwe
    link
    English
    203 hours ago

    Last year I placed two dozen or so pumpkins around my property and got up on the roof and started shootin with my AR until the neighbor called, claiming some maniac was on my roof shootin a gun so I went inside cuz that sounded pretty spooky smh can’t have nothin nice no more

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    English
    494 hours ago

    It’s not a waste if its sole purpose for existing is to rot on porches. It’s just a bonus if you can squeeze out another use, like becoming an emergency room curiosity.

    • @bulwark
      link
      English
      83 hours ago

      Wait, why would it become an emergency room curiosity? Ohhhhh, missed that last part. Gourds really are nature’s dildo.

      • DreamButt
        link
        English
        72 hours ago

        Of all the things to worry about when it comes to waste Halloween doesn’t even scartch the surface for me

        Still waiting on someone to talk about how fishing nets are 50% of the plastic in our oceans

        • @HappycamperNZ
          link
          English
          314 minutes ago

          Halloween food - no.

          Halloween plastic decorations, wrapping, costumes… yeah, we can do without

        • queermunist she/her
          link
          fedilink
          English
          73 hours ago

          Pumpkins are pretty low on my priority list, but entertainment isn’t really a good reason to throw useful stuff away. It’s a waste of water, waste of growing space, waste of fuel for harvest and transportation, and obviously a waste of food.

        • Pennomi
          link
          English
          44 hours ago

          Sometimes! I think pumpkins are fairly harmless though

  • @MeatsOfRage
    link
    English
    52 hours ago

    Toss them in the woods, deer fuckin love pumpkin

  • Zathras
    link
    fedilink
    English
    103 hours ago

    If you know someone with chickens, give your pumpkins to them. The chickens love to eat the insides all the way to the edge of the rind. It is also supposed to be a natural dewormer.

  • Blackout
    link
    fedilink
    83 hours ago

    I let the squirrels have at it, even giving them a hole to get the seeds. Then when it starts rotting into the compost can. I gotta have that pumpkin spice dirt.

  • @JusticeForPorygon
    link
    English
    11 hour ago

    I’m not an expert but I’m pretty sure the pumpkins you carve are not the same pumpkins you eat. You can roast the seeds, sure, but the inside will probably taste like dirt

  • @[email protected]OPM
    link
    fedilink
    English
    164 hours ago

    Toasted pumpkin seeds:

    Using running water seperate seeds from pumpkin guts. Soak them in salt water while you carve. Preheat and bake at 220C for 15-20 mins. Eat them whole.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      English
      131 minutes ago

      I had an elementary school teacher who would ask all of us to save the seeds when making jack o lanterns and give it to her. She’d then make a ton of roasted pumpkin seeds and share it with us and some kids from other classes who brought seeds.

      They are pretty good. Highly recommend.

    • @DarkCloud
      link
      English
      12 hours ago

      Or rather than soak them, you can manually separate them, oil and salt them, then cook them on a lower setting until they start to go golden brown.