Kid named my gym membership
“Jim Membership”
“Jim Body”
Isn’t that the senator that protected that coach that did a bunch of sexual abuse? He never got cancelled.
Let me tell you aout the only gym membership I ever had. It was a little place around the corner that was open late and rarely full. I enjoyed my time there up until I had to leave to the cold north on a work contract.
There were no memes to warn me about what happened next.
First they asked me where I was going so they could find town near my camp. There’s no goddamn way I thought a town, pop. 3000, had a gym along with it’s one main road and rocky woodland, but their franchise had spread that far. They said I could use that location instead. When I explained I’d only be spending one day a week in a town that was 250km from camp, they were like “Well one day a week is still a good deal!”
The rest of my week would be in the woods doing long days of manual labour, like carrying 30lbs of equipment and supplies for ten hours a day, but they insisted. I insisted not.
They tried shame: Was I not interested in maintaining physical health?
They tried to appeal to my budget: One month at half off.
They tried guilt: But I’d been with them for so long.
They tried hanging up so I had to call them back.
In the end I had to threaten to contest the charge to get them to cancel.
In the real end I had to call them from the woods to ask why I was still charged for the next month. They pleaded with me to suspend my membership until I came back, so I said I was moving to another country. And that was the end.
Learn from my mistakes, I thought I was taking care of my body but that’s just the illusion the cast over their gaping maw of a snake’s mouth. Their tactics have only gotten more sophisticated since then, making escape even more impossible.
Please, for your own sake, never go to gym.
What in the world. Do people really have a hard time dis-enrolling from gyms?
They make the vast majority of their money from memberships that aren’t used.
Start adding CEO names.
Start with Putin and Netanyahu. If they’re cancelled by everyone, that includes their subordinates. They won’t be able to wage their wars if people won’t follow their orders.
And Rotenberg, Miller, Gref. They are Putin’s oligarchs with very russian-sounding lastnames.
Kadirov, Patrushev, Soloviev, Kiselev.
It’s basically the death note but less brutal
Or maybe more brutal, depending how harsh the cancelling is
This death note book, I’d be more into having it for the fact it comes with an imaginary friend.
Careful, if you’re not interesting you won’t be kept around for long
Cancel the Netflix version of Death Note
That shit was absolute trash
No such thing exists
Except for Ryuk. He’s good even in terrible adaptations.
Was that with Willem Dafoe?
Yeah, the one good part of it
Shouldn’t that be Prime or Netflix?
Every service you can sign up for online in the USA has an easy cancelation process, as Californian law mandates it. However, some services geogate that process so that only Californians can use it, making everyone else go through a more tedious process, just because they can.
FTC click-to-cancel (which is modeled after the Californian law) can’t come soon enough. Companies are complaining about it because they make a lot of money by retaining customers that want to cancel, but it would be very easy for them to all roll out their California-specific cancelation flows to everyone.
Prime is now a lot easier to cancel, since they got sued.
Netflix I only ever subscribed to with a gift card, so that was pretty easy…
Cancelling is easy with consumer protection laws.
At least Netflix has a button on the site you can click and cancel.
Now, gym memberships…
