• @[email protected]
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    4 days ago

    “When the fuck do they expect me to do this?” Being replaced by “perhaps I should work later” is top tier military satire.

    No fucking chance of working late voluntarily. Not paid for it. Only do when told to.

    • @Pacattack57
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      504 days ago

      My favorite is “Ask me if I give a fuck” being replaced by “Of course I’m concerned!”

  • @TheDoozer
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    604 days ago

    My favorite part is “Eat shit and die” is addressed to the enlisted (“excuse me” being the replacement) and “Eat shit and die, motherfucker” is addressed to officers (“excuse me, Sir”), because you wouldn’t be saying “sir” to enlisted members.

    • @[email protected]
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      94 days ago

      My favorite layer on top of this is that the “excuse me, sir” maps back to “eat shit and die, motherfucker” regardless of intent

  • @[email protected]
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    574 days ago

    Aint no way thats real right? Thats like shooter games with blood and death being concerned about swearwords in chat.

    • @shalafi
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      524 days ago

      We were passing this around the office in the 90s as “business etiquette”.

    • @FelixCress
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      264 days ago

      It is a very, very old joke. At least 20odd years old.

  • @Avatar_of_Self
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    253 days ago

    A) it’s fake. The specific squadron would be called out explicitly on that memoradum. Paragraph 1 would definitely have to referenced at least 3 AFIs and paragraph 2 would have definitely (especially being an SFS Memo) disclosed punishment via the UCMJ.

    B) that copy paste memo indicates it is from a local security forces commander and definitely not the USAF.

    I know it’s supposed to be a joke but I figure I’d note the amount of fakery here since there’s always this kind of mythos that lives a long life.

    Everything from the supposed sanctioned DOD standard of 7 wipes of a disk (never was a thing – The Orange Book/NISPOM on e referenced a study by Gutmann in the 90s), that basically training issues stress cards to trainees (been a rumor as if fact since the early aughts and I’m sure earlier), that’s there’s a single bullet and 9mm gun at the top of the flag pole at base command, that the Etherbunny was a thing that happened to a friend’s roommate, that the country will take care of you after you serve and perhaps worst of all – Marines don’t literally eat crayons and it is just a joke.

    • @abigscaryhobo
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      12 days ago

      See, you invalidated that whole thing with the last line. Every marine has at least bitten a crayon. Some people have allergies.

    • don
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      154 days ago

      Where the fuck is that leading Sir! It’s “Sir! Eat shit and die motherfucker, Sir!” GUESS WHO’S GETTING AN EXTRA 30 LBS ADDED TO THEIR RUCKSACK ON THE NEXT HUMP!

  • Franklin
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    3 days ago

    “there seems to be a disconnect”

    is my favorite professional way to say what the fuck are you talking about?

  • @[email protected]
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    184 days ago

    Ahhh I get it. When we would say the right side in pleasant company, we would really say the left side in reality.

    “I wasn’t involved in the project” is unlikely to have ever been said out loud, but “it’s not my fucking problem” is the correct phrase.

    “Really?” Has never left my lips. “You’ve gotta be shitting me” is something I’ll say 7-10x per code review.

  • @[email protected]
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    83 days ago

    Your great great grandmother cheated on your great great grandfather with this joke. So fucking old

  • @thebestaquaman
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    74 days ago

    For added effect, read the right-hand side in the voice of a British aristocrat.