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On the bright side, you can masturbate around them and no one will know! By smell at least.
Unless the tree narcs on you.
God damn talking trees, snitching bastards all of em
Damn, I wish I’d read your second sentence.
Yeah my college campus had an area with Bradford pear trees and that definitely created more than one awkward conversation.
Wait, a what?
An awkward conversation is a conversation that feels awkward, often due to the subject being socially taboo.
But that’s not important right now. Don’t call me Shirley.
Do you like movies about gladiators?
Gladiator? I hardly know her!
No, they surely referred to “college campus” with their comment!
A college campus traditionally refers to the land and buildings of a college or university. This will often include libraries, lecture halls, student centers and, for residential universities, residence halls and dining halls.
Like a conversation about why everything smells like cum amongst a bunch of 18 to 23 year olds.
Since no one has given you a serious answer yet, Bradford Pears are the type of tree that smells like male ejaculate.
They even make these long strands that are covered in their tree jizz (pollen)
The people I know who say Bradford pears smell awful say they smell like piss, not cum.
All of the people I know who say Bradford smell like piss also have the cilantro tastes like soap gene so I always wonder if the two are related or just a coincidence in the small sample size.
I like cilantro and think Bradford pears have a strong smell like many plants do, but it doesn’t remind me of anything in particular.
They must consider you “polite society” so they say piss instead of jizz.
I love cilantro, it tastes like heaven not soap. But bradford pears smell like jizz.
Nope, one is my wife who laughed the first time she saw a meme about it smelling like cum and speculated they mixed up their trees.
huh, i don’t think cilantro tastes like soap, but i think bradford pears smell like cat piss. Our fucking HOA decided to use them as landscaping.
I thought those were linden trees
Maybe you’re right and I got them mixed up. There could be more than one awful-smelling tree
Ginkgo trees don’t have flowers. They are gymnosperms like pines, firs, spruces, cedars etc. They produce cones.
Their “fruit” smell like ass though. Not even fruit, just a fleshy pine cone of sorts.
They smell like vomit.
Not even fruit, just a fleshy pine cone of sorts.
Some places they eat the fruit, like Japan and China
Yeah they actually are not to bad tastewise. Just be sure to use gloves when handling the raw fruits with the stinky flesh around it.
I heard various things about their health benefits. But people seem to agree to only consune small amounts.
uh, why? 🍐ԅ( ͒ ͒ )
Yeah, the meme is fine but OP got the wrong tree in the title. Should be the callery pear.
Isn’t all pollen basically tree cum?
No, it’s genetically the offspring of the plant, and contains at least one non-reproductive cell. Pollen produces the male gametes, so the seeds created from it produce the 3rd generation of plant, genetically speaking. (1st gen is pollen producer, 2nd gen is pollen, 3rd gen is seed.) It’s basically an ultra-minimal gametophyte stage.
So it’s tree…pre…cum? Wait, no, the tree is throwing his balls into the air, but he also grows more balls…?
Why did I even start typing today?
Well, the pollen does grow an enormous (relatively) schlong to deliver its sperm into the stamen…
Trees are just inverted root systems
Yeah, but why does it sometimes smell like mammal cum?
I don’t know WHY. But the relevant tree is called (Götterbaum in German) or Tree of Heaven - beautiful
Fucking hate trees of heaven, they should be called Trees from Hell. Invasive little shits grow everywhere
That’s a different tree, we have (because we plant it) the Callery pear which smells like sperm and a bloody nose combined, they chose it because of the root size and height and I guess they also couldn’t smell.
Some trees are pollinated by beetles, flies, or other insects that might normally be attracted to rotting flesh. As a result, they often emit a more meaty odor. Why cum specifically I can’t say but I think cum has certain organic molecules in common with dead things.
I almost did a joke re: dead things and sex, which was meant to be self depreciating… But it kept sounding like i was stanning necrophilia. So here we are.
Doesn’t cum just smell like bleach or avocado? Nothing in particular?
It definitely smells like salty bodily fluids.
My nose is not so good for that, so feel free to cum anywhere, I won’t figure it out.
That’s the strangest invite to a bukkake party I’ve ever gotten. I’m down.
The bleachiness is in the nose, and it’s flourine, which smells very like, but distinct to chlorine, which is in most bleaches.
You detect saltiness with your tongue, not your nose.
Yes, it was very fucking salty, like chemical burn, unnatural saltiness.
I’ve never had an avocado that smelt like bleach. Are they supposed to smell like that?
Posted: 16 Years Ago
The mark of a legend.
I thought this for the longest time until I fell down a rabbit hole a while back. Pollen is literally the tree’s offspring in the form of microscopic plants. When the flowers of a tree are fertilized, the pollen literally grow into the actual reproductive parts of the plant to begin the fertilization process.
Reproductive organs smelling like reproductive organs isn’t that weird, now that I think about it, reproductive organs smelling like flowers are weird…
You’re a wizard, Harry
I absolutely hate Bradford pears but people in the south LOVE planting them. Damn fools, I say!
I have friends that apparently can’t even smell them
Smh outed themselves as gooners who can’t even tell anymore
I tried getting them with this by asking if they could smell them and all I got was “it’s 50/50 because of my allergies”
The people who owned our house before us planted one in our front yard. We didn’t realize what it was until a couple years after we had lived here and it started sprouting its flowers. Even then it took us a while to realize where that smell is coming from. Now the thing is fucking huge and taking it down would be incredibly difficult and expensive because of where it’s planted. So 3 weeks out of the year we just don’t go outside and keep our windows closed… 😑
P.S. we do not live in the south. I don’t even understand why this thing is here.
The only good news about it being massive is that if the wind blows a little too hard it’ll crack in half!
Image of a large Bradford pear tree that has a large limb broken from the trunk
figs have entered the chat
Please don’t tell me figs smell like cum as well! My wife just got a fig tree for our patio
You might be fine with a small potted plant, but yeah they stink.
Hm? Can’t confirm. My parents have a huge one, doesn’t smell.
Gross
Fig didn’t smell like cum, not that I can tell what cum smells like, given that I have been covered in it so much, I can’t smell it at all.
No but you’re eating a dead wasp every time you eat a fig! The More You Know™
Cumtrees also have a right to exist
Bradford Pear tree next
Pretty flowers they remind me of my dearly departed Harold.
We have this other tree that’s grown around here a lot. It has the most beautiful explosion of purple flowers every spring. Then it just smells like cum all day lol
Jacarandandfindout!
Yeah there was a tree that was flowering for like 3 weeks in june and it made ma want to puke it smelled so bad. Still have no clue what tree it was and it was luckily only where I worked and not where I live. So I did not have to smell it constantly.
