• @[email protected]
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    10 months ago

    Obligatory: make sure your deep fryer turkey is fully thawed before dunking it. If you’re pulling it out of the freezer at the time of this writing, you’re gonna start a fire. Happy turkey day!

    • Khrux
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      1010 months ago

      I’m not from the USA and ice always wanted to ask, is deep frying the turkey really how it’s done or is it just a joke?

      • Shalakushka
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        10 months ago

        Most (99%) oven roast the turkey but the fattest of rednecks deep fry it to show reverence to their fat ancestors.

        • @[email protected]
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          2610 months ago

          As a fat redneck, you’re mostly correct. You just forgot to add the word drunk in there somewhere.

          Imma fry one up in about half an hour. I’m also gonna start drinking in just a minute. My fat drunk uncle who lost several of his fingers in a fireworks incident is smiling down on me from redneck heaven.

        • @ThatWeirdGuy1001
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          10 months ago

          The funniest part is it’s the middle class white dudes who burn down their backyards meanwhile bubba and Uncle Jim Bob will give you the juiciest fuckin turkey you’ll ever have in your entire life.

          • Zeppo
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            510 months ago

            I would always trust Bubba and Uncle Jim Bob to cook and grill better than Sam or Elliot from the insurance company

        • Khrux
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          310 months ago

          Amazing answer, exactly why I I thought it was better to ask than Google it.

        • @chuckleslord
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          210 months ago

          Listen, I’m vegetarian now, but deep fried is the way to do it. Juicy, flavorful, plus you risk an explosion. Nothing more flavourful than the fear of death!

      • @[email protected]
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        810 months ago

        Nope it’s definitely a thing. We’ve got a bird in the oven now, but some friends are bringing over another bird and their fryer this afternoon. Deep fried turkey is delicious, nevermind the fat jokes lol

        • JJROKCZ
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          110 months ago

          Air fried is not deep fried though, similar results but no risk of explosion and the same as deep fried

      • @[email protected]
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        510 months ago

        there are some restaurants that hire a trailer truck full of friers and line them up in the car park to create an assembly line of fried turkeys.

      • @[email protected]
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        210 months ago

        The US is a very diverse country, some people deep fry their turkey, most people don’t. Many families don’t make turkey at all.

  • @[email protected]
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    3310 months ago

    I read an article about not defrosting if you’re cooking it in the oven. It said you just add 50% time at temp.

    I’m not a bird guy though, so I’m really just here to hint at knowledge that exists for you to find, which really makes you think about how knowledge works in the first place and how your brain can trigger memory from either sensory input or thought or both, but then sometimes it’s not there also.

    Anyway someone in the fam got covid so I’m doing steaks instead.

    • @Holyhandgrenade
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      710 months ago

      How can you rub butter and spices under the skin if the turkey is frozen solid?

        • @Stamau123
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          210 months ago

          You seperate it around the neck

        • JJROKCZ
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          110 months ago

          Cut the skin, pull it up, pinch some of the seasoning in your fingers and stick your fingers under the skin, rub it around. Done

          • Toes♀
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            110 months ago

            Can’t say I’ve ever seen that, cool. I’ve been known to slice slits into it and stuff that with seasoning.

      • Zeppo
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        110 months ago

        Wait until it’s kinda thawed, then take it out and do that

    • @lambchop
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      410 months ago

      Could you consider that thoughts are just a form of sensory input?

  • @[email protected]
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    10 months ago

    Nah you can actually defrost it really fast by doing sous vide or an aproximation By having somewhat regularly flowing water with it in the sink or bathtub. You can also cook frozen but you will want to really rub butter or oil on the skin on the outside since you cant get it under the skin and baste the turkey every hour or so until its up to temp.

    Its too late to get a nice brine but there are reasonable answers to getting a nice dinner anyways.

      • @[email protected]
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        10 months ago

        Its not super great, but it sorta depends on how you bring it up and that you dont do it in a way that takes hours of it being above the bacteria threshold like by using an immersion circulator. And then baking it fully up to temp immediately after. Ita not best practice but its often usable if you have no other options.

        • @[email protected]
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          110 months ago

          Also, it (can) ruin the flavour, if done at too high temperatures. And im not sure but osmosis can also take away some flavour.

  • @misophist
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    2010 months ago

    Just set your deep fryer to 450 and sous-vide that frozen bird in hot oil for a minute.

  • Flying Squid
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    2010 months ago

    It’s only too late if you expect to have company.

    It’s never too late if you’re planning on eating that whole big boy yourself.

  • Jo Miran
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    1510 months ago

    If you leave it in a full bathtub now, you should be ready to fry tomorrow (~9 hours to thaw 10-14lbs turkey in a tub). Too late for a good bake though.

      • VioletRing
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        610 months ago

        I’ve started with a frozen bird in the morning, and had a nicely baked turkey at a reasonable time this way. Put it in a bath until it’s not entirely a brick, replacing some of the water frequently. Balance it in the sink so you can run the faucet down the neck. Run water until spine is thawed enough to spatchcock. Doesn’t matter if most the meat is still frozen, it’ll cook fine.

        *Went to brine my turkey the day before and found a weird “growth”. It was really unappetizing and concerning, so I overreacted and threw out the bird. Could only find frozens, so the new bird only had overnight in the fridge. After buying a new turkey I thought to get on the Butterball turkey help line. They were fantastic and assured me the growth was actually a processing burn and totally safe.

          • VioletRing
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            410 months ago

            Yep, it’s great! You can call or text with all your turkey questions. I texted and so the lady helping me even asked for pictures of the “growth”! She sent the issue up the line until it was identified. This was just last year, and I’m still mad about throwing out a perfectly good turkey before trying the helpline.

        • @hydrospanner
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          110 months ago

          You’ve just given away your identity, Mr. Joe Bethersonton of Fargo, North Dakota.

      • @SpaceNoodle
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        510 months ago

        Sure, lemme just fetch the turkey chainsaw

  • Semi-Hemi-Demigod
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    10 months ago

    Mine’s been in the brine for about 24 hours. Just added another bag of ice and flipped the bird.

    • @grue
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      2510 months ago

      It’s too late to defrost a frozen ham, too.

      • Snot Flickerman
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        10 months ago

        Depends on the size of the ham. One chunk of ham just for two people? Its possible.

        But I just didn’t freeze mine, its got a sell-by date of Dec. 3rd, so kept it in the fridge.

        • @SpaceNoodle
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          210 months ago

          OK? One chunk of turkey just for two people can defrost in a day, too.

  • @emolr
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    210 months ago

    I’m at a US military base in the Eastern hemisphere so it’s absolutely too late for us here.

  • @hakunawazo
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    110 months ago

    That’s me everytime I have frozen ground meat. Then I stab it like a serial killer with a dull knife in the heated cooking pot until it breaks. It’s almost like a ritual.