Then you have a kid and you spend the rest of your life
If kids are creme pies, and kids grow up to be adults, then we are all creampies.
creampie goblin
I’m taking that username so nobody else can
Can’t get pregnant that way
You sure are there, squirt.
HAH
I’m lab grown
Ooh let’s come up with a nickname for your kind… you’re a test tube baby, so a tuber 🥔🍠 (potato emojis)
or
You! Tuber!
We are all cream pies on this blessed day
every year when everybody has birthday parties, everybody should serve creampies instead of birthday cakes. Because of the symbolism.
GOOD point
It’s an awkward scary part of our life. Fierce competition. Won by pure luck.
Not long after our first breath of air we start regretting our life choices.
Pretty sure Hitchhiker’s Guide has a quote about this
👌👌👌
Socially acceptable, How about this song from the classy 1920s:
"Oh I got nipples on my titties the size of my thumb
I got sumthin’ between my legs that’ll make a man cum"
I don’t remember the last rest of the lyrics but damn what a banger
The magnificent Lucille Bogan
And here’s another great one of hers
You left out the part of the lyrics where the man is dead.
Well, not anymore
Death by snu snu? Not a bad way to go.
sang by Nicky Minaj
or my girls pussy
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that is so true.
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I do when my employer questions my call out.
If my employer questioned my call out, my next call would be the union rep.
“Lolz, what union?” - My Boss
The thing preventing car bombs from vaporizing you and thine ilk.
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Yeah, consider yourself lucky in that regard, though when the Tories start thinking about rolling it back, you might want to be prepared to blow up Parliament.
Sorry for living in the US I guess? At my job I would get fired after 3 days without a doctor’s note.
I think the joke is that human bodies are kind of gross and social niceties are merely arbitrary rules we’ve imposed on ourselves. The only reason why we don’t go into graphic detail about the nature of reproduction is because we’ve been conditioned to consider the act pure and holy and not a messy creampie with buckets of jizz.
Depends on your social circles I guess.
Name a social circle where you can use language like in the first example, and it’s acceptable.
Furry Discord servers
I’m learning a lot today
Cums with the territory.
🍍
Friends who are OK talking about and don’t shame you about sex. Also friends who have a sense of fucking humor.
this one
Well you got me there
I know several people in the kink community who would congratulate and be enthusiastically happy for someone who said the first, but would only politely say “congrats” to the second.
A BDSM munch comes to mind.
I’m ok with not knowing what that is. I’ll take your word for it.
A munch is a non-sexual social gathering of kinky people with food.
My friends and family say this kind of shit all the time, I’m sorry your life is without humor.
Big assumption there chief
Furry convention
Half of my former social circle would have found the second version unacceptable
yes that’s what euphemisms are for
You can say anything you want to anyone, but there’s usually a better way to say it.
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It is a joke. People will openly tell you “we’re trying for a baby.”
What that actually means is “we’re fucking like rabbits”, and the fact that that’s socially okay to say is kinda funny.
This is an SNL skit about two gay men trying for a baby: https://youtu.be/v7PYpysL_dI?si=AfIRnvUkFoH2rINu
This has nothing to do with disliking kids. It’s just poking fun at how we euphemise things sometimes.
On another note, I really fucking hate kids lol. I’m so glad I’ll never have them. How much I loathe them is nowhere near how obnoxious people get about their kids. They make them their whole personality way more than I ever will make being child free mine.
Pretty sure this is what most people call a joke.
Thank you for saying that. I loathe the child free people, and I don’t have kids. They’re all so stringent!
I just like that someone is getting laid every night and that is part of their best life. In fact, I assumed the hot messy creampie woman is managing her fertility as she sees fit.
Also jizz is totally a drug. Dopemine, I think.
And yet the doctor tells me I have to stop snorting jizz because it’s “bad for my lungs”. Like, ok narc smh
That raises some good questions about how to best absorb dopamine from jizz. I suspect anally is super-effective.
Inhalation of nebulized jizz probably less so, but worth a try.
My wife got pregnant on our first try. Yes, I am that potent.
We live in a susiety.
And when they do get pregnant I’m the asshole for saying “congratulations on your successful ejaculation!”
I’ll take girl #1, Pat.
You say: We aren’t trying for a baby, but we’re not avoiding it either.
I hear: I’m off my birth control and we’re raw-dogging like 5 times a day.
You can make nothing sounds unacceptable when your that verbose
