Alcohol and weed don’t sound appealing.

  • @rustyfish
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    799 months ago

    Sleep on her side of the bed. Then don’t tell her what you did.

  • @SuperSynthia
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    329 months ago

    When my partner is out of town, I put porn on the big screen

    • Scrubbles
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      99 months ago

      When my partner is out of town that’s the one time I splurge for an actual porn subscription

    • @[email protected]
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      59 months ago

      My mum was raised without eating pork (they just didn’t have it growing up), and my dad saw and heard the abattoir near daily and associates the smell of pork with screaming children.

      On the odd weekend when they were both away, us kids would sprint to the store, grab reams of bacon and cook it fast on the sly for a real fry-up. We’d have to air out the house as well afterwards to get rid of the smell, but they’d always know and complain about it when they got back

      • @[email protected]
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        29 months ago

        Protip for if you find a time machine: Charcoal Grill, fire extinguisher, tinfoil, and a pan that’ll fit in the grill. Start your grill, get it all hot and stuff, line your pan with foil, drop your bacon on, cover, and check occasionally, flip when needed. DO NOT spill the grease, but if you do that’s why the fire extinguisher is here. For best results use thick cut bacon (always).

        Keeps the smell outside and it’ll be some of the best bacon you’ve ever had, it’s just kiiiind of a fire hazard…

  • @[email protected]
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    289 months ago

    Do what I do, plan for porn, fastfood and beer. In reality you buy a six pack of your old brand, then drink half a beer with a large cheeseburger. Get queasy from the burger and fall a sleep before you manage to play with yourself. Wake up to find that the dog ate your fries and got diarrhea, which you slept through on account of the beer. Now clean up dog diarrhea with hangovers while swearing that you’ll never drink half a beer.

    LPT: disable the roomba before sitting down, and make sure that the dog has been walked…

  • Zloubida
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    289 months ago

    Don’t change your underwear for two days.

  • @sicarius
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    179 months ago

    Try a tab of lsd and go for a nice walk in the woods

    • TurtleCalledCalmie
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      69 months ago

      Just to add to this. Take a nice shower, eat something light, wear comfy cloths, and take your trip. Stay safe, enjoy, and have bottle of water with you :)

    • @[email protected]
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      59 months ago

      Ugh. I hate it when people have a far easier time than I do finding drugs. Every dealer assumes I’m a cop

      • @[email protected]
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        29 months ago

        Mushrooms are sold in head shops in Oakland, California. I understand that to be the case in a number of cities. You may be able to make your way to one of them.

        • @[email protected]
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          19 months ago

          Are they sold openly this way? Or does the person behind the counter need to trust you to sell them to you?

  • mommykink
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    159 months ago

    Find a good stick and bring it inside

    • @Daft_ishOP
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      9 months ago

      Heh yeah. I’ll just call up my xoke dealer.

      Edit:

      bout to get wild

  • @[email protected]
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    129 months ago

    Ooh, study for 14 hours straight and forget to eat! That’s usually what I do. Wild times.

  • all-knight-party
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    129 months ago

    I watch horribly artsy movies or put speed runs on the big TV, blast music aloud, I order a pizza, and I consume the substances you don’t find appealing, and I wear the same clothes the entire time without changing