• @brucethemoose
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    3 months ago

    Max is already in the library.

      • @NatakuNox
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        3 months ago

        Change number one: All late fees must be paid in cat treats.

        Change two: All dog owners are banned from entering the library.

    • @mipadaitu
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      233 months ago

      Max has always been in the library.
      Max will always be in the library.

    • @assassinatedbyCIA
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      193 months ago

      Knowing my inattentive ass I would have read that sign after happily letting max into the library.

    • @Osito
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      23 months ago

      Mad is behind me in the library isn’t he?

  • @Lost_My_Mind
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    863 months ago

    This could honestly be a 90s kids cartoon. Every week Max has a new plan to get into the Library, with the intent of knocking books off the shelf. And every week, the mean librarian has to try to stop his plan.

    • @I_Fart_Glitter
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      133 months ago

      What do you want to do today, Max?

      TRY TO GET IN TO THE LIBRARY!! 😼

      • @Lost_My_Mind
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        53 months ago

        Ya know, I was trying to avoid the Animaniacs tie-in, because I thought it was a little TOO on the nose…but yeah, I totally imagined him in that animation style.

      • ivanafterall ☑️
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        3 months ago

        Hairy Larry and the Library.

        On second thought, yours still sounds more kid-friendly.

    • @[email protected]
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      33 months ago

      so a kerazy cartoon, huh boss? The main character would be a cross between a cow… and a helicopter.

    • @wjrii
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      483 months ago

      Yup. I know cats can do better roaming free than most pets, but that doesn’t mean it’s safe for them, and it’s certainly not safe for the local bird population.

      • @Lost_My_Mind
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        -23 months ago

        Well, at least can we let Max take out that one bird in the neighborhood that divebombs everybody waiting for the bus? It’s all black with a bit of red or orange on it’s neck. I don’t mind the pigeons, or the sparrows, or the robins, or the cardinals, or the blue jays, or the crows. They can all live…but lets make that one bird go extinct.

        • @wjrii
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          93 months ago

          Probably a nest up in the corner of the bus stop. The only time I’ve ever been dive-bombed was by some swallows when they had a nest up in the corner of the house’s porch.

        • RBG
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          23 months ago

          That bird is doing that cause it got eggs somewhere close by. Or they already hatched. Still want to kill it?

          • @[email protected]
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            23 months ago

            Yes. Don’t raise your kids at the bus stop if you can’t play nice with the bus people. That bird had ample time to realise that people are always using the bus stop. Bird should have laid eggs somewhere peaceful. Now bird is being an asshole for no reason as a response to its own bad choices. We should kill off asshole birds like that and let the species evolve smarter and less mean.

            Fun fact: a lot of fairy tales have wolves going after humans with a ferocity you will not see in nature. This is because back when those stories were written, they did. However, humans are vindictive. Man-killer wolves would be hunted down with spears and killed. Over time, wolves evolved to be more cautious of humans and less aggressive. And now our wolf problems are solved.

      • stebo
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        -43 months ago

        not every cat hunts birds, and in rural areas it’s pretty safe for them to be outside

        • @[email protected]
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          93 months ago

          You must not live in North America, because house cats are about half thr diet of coyotes in the US and Canada.

    • walden
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      83 months ago

      100%. Cats are fine, but wild birds are better.

    • @[email protected]
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      43 months ago

      Yep you should make sure to jump out from behind a bush or tree to make sure your cat stays on its toes the entire time it’s outside.

  • @BonesOfTheMoon
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    553 months ago

    I used to work in the ER years ago in a small community hospital, and this neighborhood cat had figured out how the automatic doors on the ambulance ramp worked, and would slip in behind the paramedics and go curl up in the triage chair and wait for patients to come to the window to say hi. She also made rounds of the neighbouring nursing home and hospice on a regular basis.

    • MeatPilot
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      313 months ago

      Sounds like it was collecting souls

      • @cynar
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        13 months ago

        More like farming them.

        Tend them and care for them so they grow big and strong. You only want to pluck them when they are perfectly ripe.

  • @NocturnalMorning
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    363 months ago

    Meanwhile Max is decimating the local bird population, and risking getting hit by cars.

    • @scrion
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      -133 months ago

      Please note that this is not a global problem, and that keeping a cat indoors is also not a solution - just don’t get a cat then.

      • Blackout
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        113 months ago

        My cat is very happy and healthy indoors and turned 19 this year. Got another 10 in him too.

        • @scrion
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          03 months ago

          Happy to hear that! Give them some extra pets today!

  • @thenextguy
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    283 months ago

    Guards. Make sure Max doesn’t enter the library under any circumstance.

    Right, keep max in the library, even if he wants to leave.

    No, no. Keep max out of the library at all times.

    We don’t have to do anything other than keep Max in the library.

    Out of the library…

    Oh, I remember. Can he enter the library with us?

    • IninewCrow
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      63 months ago

      Guards: … please come with us, Emperor Max has ordered us to arrest you

  • @norimee
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    283 months ago

    WHY would you not want Max in the library?

  • FlashMobOfOne
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    253 months ago

    I wonder what Max did to get banished from the library.

    • @MissJinx
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      193 months ago

      Having cats I would bet he peed in the library

      • FlashMobOfOne
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        113 months ago

        Yes, probably, but I want to think in my mind that it was something super chaotic and daring, like a furry super-villain.

        • @tburkhol
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          163 months ago

          Typical cat just knocking things off shelves - the library is an inexhaustible playground.

    • @Kaput
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      103 months ago

      Meow at the door until someone opens it, then not go outside and go back to sleep on someone’s reading material.

  • @militaryintelligence
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    203 months ago

    Instructions clear, have filled the library with cats not named Max

  • Flying Squid
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    173 months ago

    I had a doggie named Max. He had bat ears. We called him BatMax. He died over two years ago. Now I miss Max.

    Not your fault, obviously.

  • Anas
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    3 months ago

    This is not fair, why do everyone else’s opinions matter more and are in a larger font? Max can make his own decisions!