WALKER, MI—Plunking out a solo as the performance entered its 45th minute, Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump was reportedly forced to play the glockenspiel at a rally Friday after every musical artist in the country banned him from using their songs. “He started out with some sheet music, but within minutes he was just hammering […]
  • TodayEnglish
    531·
    6 months ago

    Oh how i wish this were true!! Of all the onion articles, this might be my fav!

  • bacon_saber@fedia.io
    19·
    6 months ago

    Was just thinking the RNC should just compose their own equivalent to the Imperial March and roll with that

    • mkwtEnglish
      6·
      6 months ago

      Presumably they’d still need to hire a session orchestra to record it. That might be a stumbling block.

  • panic@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
    16·
    6 months ago

    I could tell it was the Onion right away, playing an instrument would imply that TFG has a talent for anything other than ranting online and bankrupting businesses

  • jayboneEnglish
    10·
    6 months ago

    I love the pic. It’s like this whole story was based on a photoshop contest with a pic from one of his rallies.

  • qarboneEnglish
    8·
    6 months ago

    why’d the ai make his hands so big smh ^/s

      • expatriadoEnglish
        10·
        6 months ago

        maybe comment op can’t see through the layers

        • disguy_ovaheaEnglish
          10·
          6 months ago

          Why an onion? Why not parfait? Everybody likes parfait.

          • PunnyNameEnglish
            5·
            6 months ago

            Because you generally don’t want to bite into an onion.

            • clifEnglish
              2·
              6 months ago

              Says you. I find onions delicious.

              O no…

              • PunnyNameEnglish
                2·
                6 months ago

                It’s different if you enjoy a Vidalia onion. You’re just that much weirder.

    • SkyezOpenEnglish
      8·
      6 months ago

      A sea of deleted comments. The hell do you even do here?

      • QuetzalcutlassEnglish
        5·
        6 months ago

        Back on Reddit there were people who set up scripts to automatically delete comments after a set amount of time to prevent people from looking at their history. As you could probably guess, they were usually the most stubborn and argumentative sort on the platform.

        Though I’ve upvoted that user before and I normally don’t do that to people being disruptive, so who knows? If only there were some sort of history that would tell me what kind of user they were…

        • SkyezOpenEnglish
          2·
          6 months ago

          I just looked at their profile to see if they were a moron. Basically every comment is deleted.

          • Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.comEnglish
            1·
            6 months ago

            Aha! Voyager just shows they have like five comments, but doesn’t show that any have been deleted.

      • OptionalEnglish
        1·
        6 months ago

        We sing. We dance. We are a simple people, sahib.