• @[email protected]
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    102 hours ago

    It would work until the polar bear population collapses in a couple generations due to inbreeding.

    • @petersr
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      63 hours ago

      Does it really need to be a big container ship?

      Didn’t people transport stuff in smaller boats back in the day?

      (You still make a valid point though)

      • @[email protected]
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        11 hour ago

        they did specify freight! although getting The Cutty Sark back in working order is probably even more costly.

      • @[email protected]
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        32 hours ago

        Idk, polar bears are really heavy, and it takes a long time to get from one end of the planet to the other, so you want something secure to store the bears in. That means a bigger ship that can handle angry bears hurling themselves at the walls of their cage, because they will wake up during the journey, and they won’t be happy.

  • @Ibaudia
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    256 hours ago

    I think the penguins would learn to just swim away, and the bears would starve since they would need to expend a lot of effort for a small bird versus the calorie-dense seals they’re used to.

      • @[email protected]
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        82 hours ago

        That is a king penguin, not even the tallest subspecies (emperors are taller), but what you’re looking at is an optical illusion because the penguin is much closer to the camera than the humans.

        • @[email protected]
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          2 hours ago

          Polar bears can fish (in this video they’re catching char, which is closely related to salmon), they’re just not used to it.

          If they can eat fish, they can probably figure out penguins as well, which honestly aren’t too different from seals (slow on land, fast in the water).

    • @[email protected]
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      24 hours ago

      They’d need to ambush the flock when they were on land, ensuring they could corner several before the penguins make it to water

  • @[email protected]
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    187 hours ago

    This reminds me of a friend that once proposed that if we really wanted to mess with Europe we could release a few packs of coyotes

  • @[email protected]
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    549 hours ago

    Etymologists crying and shaking right now at the thought of Antarctica (meaning: without bears) gaining the one animal it’s not supposed to have

    • @[email protected]
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      151 minutes ago

      I’m not saying this will definitely reverse the Earth’s polarity and doom all life on earth, but do we really want to take that chance?!

    • @SirSamuel
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      189 hours ago

      I read that as entomologist for a second and was really confused

      Figured it had something to do with fleas

  • TheTechnician27
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    13 hours ago

    Antarctica is generally colder than the Arctic. They would almost certainly be stuck along the coastlines of Antarctica like the penguins are, since the interior average temperatures rival the coldest ones ever recorded in the Arctic. They should be fine there, but then that means they have a very limited distribution and that penguins and seals consequently are always forced to share an environment with the polar bears. Because they’re not used to the polar bears, their populations would likely be destroyed, leaving the polar bears to starve. Unlike in the Arctic, too, they would have nowhere to retreat if their food supply ran out. Outward is hundreds of kilometers of ocean, and inward is hundreds of kilometers of unsurvivable desert.

    • @[email protected]
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      269 hours ago

      they would have nowhere to retreat if their food supply ran out.

      Um. Hello? There are scientists there.


      Which means scientific papers, then tourists, then garbage and a symbiotic relationship, then the eventual domestication of polar bears.
      Not, you know, the international scientific community treating scientists like cats.

      • @[email protected]
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        22 hours ago

        Idk, I think polar bears would domesticate the scientists before scientists domesticated the polar bears.

      • @Warl0k3
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        49 hours ago

        “Return Eenie or we feed another physicist to the bears. We know you fuckers took him.”

  • @mcqtom
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    8514 hours ago

    You may find you struggle with step 1.

    • @[email protected]
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      32 hours ago

      Zoos tend to struggle with Step 7 and they have far better conditions than a beat up converted freighter

    • Echo Dot
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      3711 hours ago

      I’ve been trying to do step one for years. But my bastard relatives refuse to die, and also refuse to be rich. Selfish I call it.

      • @[email protected]
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        12 hours ago

        And then my siblings also think they’re entitled to some of the non-existent inheritance. So many selfish people in my family…

  • @RegalPotoo
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    5914 hours ago

    I’d say that if all you want to do is scare the shit out of some scientists in Antarctica you probably only need 1 polar bear

    • @[email protected]
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      12 hours ago

      Yup, and there’s a lot less risk of complete disruption to the normal food chain. One polar bear will eventually die, a dozen will probably take over.

  • @TotalFat
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    3114 hours ago

    I’ve recently learned that bears absolutely love cocaine. I’m sure that’s relevant here somehow.

    • @Wooki
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      49 hours ago

      Thats why polar bears have white coats

      • @[email protected]
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        12 hours ago

        They’re actually clear coats with hollow fur, which means they always have a way to consume said cocaine. They’ve basically evolved to be addicts.

      • @felbane
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        37 hours ago

        I thought they had white coats because they take their methamphetamine production lab very seriously.

        • @Wooki
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          6 hours ago

          Pretty sure they are just rolling around in cocaine all day, hence why they are the most feared of the bears. Constantly off their head

    • @[email protected]
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      13 hours ago

      Listen to this. How about we get a big boat, put the surviving penguins inside and ship them to the Artic!

    • @Iheartcheese
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      1013 hours ago

      So then part of the program needs to be penguin Viagra to keep the numbers up

      • @Plastic_Ramses
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        9 hours ago

        Crude dark matter oil should do the job.

        Penguin spanish fly.

        • @Iheartcheese
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          15 hours ago

          I’m almost mad at myself for not making this joke originally

    • @[email protected]
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      13 hours ago

      Apparently it is 12 creatures, 6 male and 6 female, that is needed for a genetically diverse enough group to repopulate.

    • Zoidsberg
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      16 hours ago

      A couple of birth defects wouldn’t matter much if you’re walking around a penguin buffet. They’d be fine.