• @NatakuNox
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    32 hours ago

    Isn’t it strange that the first chronological story of Christianity end with, “Women are the reason everything sucks.” and yet some women are devout religious. Smh indoctrinated and brainwashed.

  • @finitebanjo
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    75 hours ago

    Technically, they were naked before trying the fruit and wore leaves upon receiving the carnal knowledge and realizing that they were naked. Before that, they had no concept of covering themselves.

    • @Tyfud
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      64 hours ago

      Correct, but due to American issues with nudity, this is always covered up with branches regardless.

      • @finitebanjo
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        34 hours ago

        You could just make their head hair cover their nipples and have them walk behind waist high sight barriers like grass or shrubbery. Just spitt-balling here.

  • @AnUnusualRelic
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    2811 hours ago

    This implies that the garden of Eden was in the US as they’re the only ones that know what pumpkin spice even is.

  • @hperrin
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    15520 hours ago

    This is not biblically accurate. She should be naked, since she doesn’t yet have knowledge of good and evil, and god considers nudity evil, because he is a prude. But also he didn’t clothe Adam and Eve, cause he’s a perv.

    • slazer2au
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      2911 hours ago

      Also bellybutton shouldn’t exist on Adam and Eve.

    • Bob
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      78 hours ago

      The comic is obviously of a theatre reproduction of the event.

    • @FilthyShrooms
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      1615 hours ago

      It’s actually just for support, they’re pretty heavy

    • @[email protected]
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      4819 hours ago

      My quip with the artistic choice is that they made Eve have very very long hair which could have served as breast cover. But they chose to add the inaccurate leaves…

    • @stupidcasey
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      618 hours ago

      To be fair they also didn’t have genitals since they can’t Fuck, so maybe they literally have nothing to be ashamed of.

      Unrelated but they also shouldn’t have belly buttons because they weren’t born.

      • lime!
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        1116 hours ago

        …then how do they have children? where did Cain and Abel come from?

        • @[email protected]
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          1014 hours ago

          …and where did all the people that came after Cain and Abel come from? Who was their mother?

          • @[email protected]
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            710 hours ago

            Cain and Able weren’t Adam and Eves only children. Keep in mind that canonically, Adam lived for over 900 years. That’s a lot of time you can use to make more babies.

            After the whole regicide incident, they also had Seth. Both him and his exiled brother ended up marrying their sisters. Their descendants did the same. So yeah, it’s all incest, top to bottom.

            The biblical flood was actually created to wipe out the descendants of Cain, since Noah and his cousins wife were both descendants of Seth

            • @[email protected]
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              28 hours ago

              Or, if you’re of a more gnostic bent, half fallen angel, half human nephilim who’d been teaching humans forbidden knowledge, such as advanced metal-crafting and makeup.

      • @scrion
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        2418 hours ago

        I don’t think that interpretation, i. e. the absent genitals, is canon.

        • Justin
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          611 hours ago

          today’s kids have the wildest headcanons smh

          I still ship mary and god tho

          • @[email protected]
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            8 hours ago

            Get this: there’s some people who think it’s canon that the serpent is Satan. Just connecting up two characters from different parts of the writing completely at random.

    • MeatPilot
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      19 hours ago

      Just like Winnie the Pooh in the Hundred Acre Wood

        • @Lazhward
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          35 hours ago

          And those girls at the party in Harold & Kumar 2.

    • @dragontamer
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      3620 hours ago

      Actually, the Bible just says it’s the fruit of a tree.

      It could have been an orange, pomegranate, or banana.

      • @[email protected]
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        47 hours ago

        Pomegranates are one of the oldest cultivated fruits, so they’re somewhat plausible, but I’m fairly certain humans made oranges (and most other citruses, through selection and grafting… though I guess it could have been a mandarin, pomelo, or citron, which seem to be the three we started with) and bananas (through selection and cloning), so it couldn’t have been those.

        Apples, on the other hand, seem to have existed long before humans, so they’re definitely a possibility.

        It was probably some kind of nut, though.

        • @Whelks_chance
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          46 hours ago

          I’ve been wondering about this for a while, and I’ve come to the conclusion that blackberries are probably the original thing. Brambles grow like weeds all over Europe, I don’t think anyone is cultivating them to be different. Apples definitely have had a human hand in selecting the best apples to start fresh orchards with.

          I’m open to correction though.

      • Chainweasel
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        513 hours ago

        Weed, they got baked and leaned the knowledge of good and evil.

      • @Noodle07
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        820 hours ago

        A nut, bit right through the shell

      • @GreenKnight23
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        417 hours ago

        I bet it was a banana, bitches love warm bananas.

  • BigFig
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    -818 hours ago

    The devil was not there in Eden. The Bible simply says a serpent.

    • @okwhateverdude
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      4116 hours ago

      The bible says lots of stuff, like this weird erotica about two slutty concubine sisters and how much they loved cock (which was too much):

      “There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.”

      https://biblehub.com/ezekiel/23-20.htm

      Truly, Divine Inspiration was given that day to that author. Praise be to Him for sharing His weird Smut with us little people.

      • @[email protected]
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        39 hours ago

        Isn’t that the story that ends in a brutal execution of the sisters? Because the author couldn’t think of nothing but the prostitutes that wouldn’t lay with him?

        • @okwhateverdude
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          68 hours ago

          https://biblehub.com/bsb/ezekiel/23.htm

          Yeah, something like that. Not really an incel-revenge, though. More like hyper-possessive misogyny. Dude “marries” a couple of prostitutes from another country. Brings them home. Very likely they aren’t super happy with the arrangement since they are inviting dudes from back home to come over. Author frames it as if they prefer their donkey sized cocks (tiny penis rage). The author has a “chat” with God and God’s prognosis of the situation is to first condemn their “infidelity” to their face and then gather a mob to do some brutal shit to the women.

      • @[email protected]
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        8 hours ago

        It’s retconned that way. There’s nothing that directly connects the serpent of Genesis, the one “roaming throughout the earth” in Job, and the character of Satan later on. Satan wasn’t developed as a character until after the Babylonian Exile. You can make it all fit, but the text alone doesn’t say that and the writers didn’t think of it that way.

        • BigFig
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          28 hours ago

          Exactly, all my downvotes for stating a historical fact about a fictional book