• @RizzRustbolt
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    501 year ago

    Bard: I rock so hard that I can almost kill a guy.

    • GladiusB
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      1 year ago

      Necromancer: magic is dead

  • @[email protected]
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    451 year ago

    Broke: Being a magical nepobaby

    Woke: Working hard for your magic powers and actually understanding them.

    • @eleefeceOP
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      291 year ago

      “Magical nepobaby” that’s going right into my vicious mockery list

    • @eleefeceOP
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      311 year ago

      Warlocks obtain their powers by making a pact with and otherworldly entity (Archfeys, Demons, Lovecrafttian horrors, etc…)

    • @[email protected]
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      51 year ago

      A warlock gets its magic by forming a pact with a magical entity like a god, devil or powerful demon.

  • balderdash
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    291 year ago

    I’m not knowledgeable at all, but it seems like charisma is more useful than intelligence in DnD

    • Pennomi
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      591 year ago

      I’m not knowledgeable at all

      Well now we know what your dump stat was.

      • @Kyrgizion
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        141 year ago

        I’m still trying to figure out what to do with 17 INT 6 WIS IRL… It’s not much I can tell you.

        • @[email protected]
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          1 year ago

          Engineering if you want to make money and suffer until you die. No charisma required. Philosophy if you only want to suffer and die. Also no charisma required for Hegel skill tree.

          • @Kyrgizion
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            11 year ago

            I lean more toward Schopenhauer and Zizec, but… hey! I see what you did there!

    • @computergeek125
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      51 year ago

      Depends on the campaign. One of my favorite characters to play is a INT/DEX artificer who got roped into somehow being in charge of saving the world.

  • @SecretSauces
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    241 year ago

    I think a college student wizard would be fun to play. Maybe the DM will allow for elf-style rests in addition to tons of coffee.

    • Flying Squid
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      151 year ago

      “I’m sorry guys, I can’t go into the Portal of Destruction with you, I have midterms.”

      • @TotallynotJessica
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        121 year ago

        The real reason they take on dangerous adventures is to pay off student debt.

      • @[email protected]
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        41 year ago

        There’s a joke about how this is also something that would be said by the player, but I’m too sleepy to come up with it.

    • @Mandarbmax
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      281 year ago

      Clerics spending hours a day praying and years of their lives serving in temples means nothing?

      Same for druids tbh

      • @Acters
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        31 year ago

        You’re right. Also, if they have to pray most of the day, how are they able to do anything else like battles or eating if there too much happening at the same time or if they are prevented from praying? What would happen? And why is it not an explored restriction that would logically make sense?

    • @joel_feila
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      81 year ago

      Well Warlock for it after they get it.

  • @UnderpantsWeevil
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    1 year ago

    Sorcerer: “I know three spells. I hope one of them is useful.”

    Warlock: “My sponsor says to burn things, so I have sixteen different ways to light shit on fire.”

    Cleric: “I’m not allowed to cast any spells until someone gets a big boo-boo.”

    Wizard:

    I am the very model of a modern Arcanologist

    I will Divine, then Transmute time, and Conjure cross the Astral Mist

    If you’ve got trouble, I’ve a spell that always is the perfect fix

    And maximize the casting to eliminate a hint of risk

    I’m very well acquainted too, with every skill imagine-ble

    Cause high int scores and bonus feats make this class unbelievable

    You think I studied hard for this? You’re right cause I’m a dungeon pro

    Both in real life and in the game, I am a true professional

    • @[email protected]
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      11 year ago

      Sorcerer: my father was privileged

      Warlock/Cleric: I’m the pawn of some privileged being

      Wizard: I work hard and become powerful on my own terms

      • @thedirtyknapkin
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        321 year ago

        more specifically, both are a transactional relationship. deities gain power through the prayer and devotion of mortal souls. like Goku with the spirit bomb. you don’t actually lose anything in the transaction, but it will go away of you stop praying and following your deities rules.

        warlocks on the other hand typically lose something in the transaction. but really it’s just a more traditional transaction is all. you have some patron of some power beyond mortals and they want something other than prayer because they are not divine and prayer won’t help them much. most classically this is a demon giving power in exchange for a soul, but it could also be the tooth fairy in exchange for the molars of your enemies if you really wanted.

    • SokathHisEyesOpen
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      11 year ago

      I think a cleric can choose a domain without choosing a god. They can also stop following their god without grievous consequences. Warlock patrons aren’t kind to pact breakers.

  • @[email protected]
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    121 year ago

    Just read it? No, somehow pour gold into the pages in order to learn it.

    Where is that money going? Who gets it? The guy who wrote the original, or is there a giant magic scroll guild stealing all those hard earned spellwriter’s profits? Is Spellify taking it and not passing it on? I have to know!

    • @[email protected]
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      31 year ago

      Wizards don’t actually commit spells fully to memory, at least not typically. The times they do they have to be simple and are called cantrips.

      Scribing a scroll to learn a spell is the wizard copying the scroll into their spellbook, requiring expensive magic ink that costs money.

    • @SameOldInternet
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      1 year ago

      The rules allow any character to wield any weapon. Usually characters weapons are chosen based on race, class, stats, and the whims of the DM.

    • @cjoll4
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      1 year ago

      Yeah, only for the last 23 years or so.

      In the most recent ruleset, certain Divine Domains such as “War” and “Tempest” get proficiency with martial weapons including swords.

  • Sagrotan
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    21 year ago

    The first thing I learned in Magick: you have to do it all by yourself. It’s not a shortcut, it’s not the easy way. But the reward at the end is worth it. That, and much more. And that’s the truth.

  • @havokdj
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    21 year ago

    Replace that coffee with a billy flip and I think it’d be spot on