• TautTwat
    link
    fedilink
    648 months ago

    My dream is to die with absolutely nothing but massive bank debt. I have no living relatives, so there is no one to get the money from. I mean, “Hello Mr. Twat you have terminal cancer” next stop is the bank to take out the biggest loan my excellent credit will let me get. Tom Selleck the house go to Vegas bet it all on black until it’s gone return home and burn the house down around me fuck the bank…a boy can dream lol

  • @cosmicrookie
    link
    388 months ago

    You never see these meme quality ads with a € or £ price… its always $

    • NickwithaC
      link
      English
      137 months ago

      That’s because America is Ferenginar.

      • @GraniteM
        link
        27 months ago

        Quark: I think I figured out why Humans don’t like Ferengi.

        Sisko: Not now, Quark.

        Quark: The way I see it, Humans used to be a lot like Ferengi: greedy, acquisitive, interested only in profit. We’re a constant reminder of a part of your past you’d like to forget.

        Sisko: Quark, we don’t have time for this.

        Quark: You’re overlooking something. Humans used to be a lot worse than the Ferengi: slavery, concentration camps, interstellar wars. We have nothing in our past that approaches that kind of barbarism. You see? We’re nothing like you… we’re better.

        DS9, The Jem’Hadar (1994)

  • Gormadt
    link
    fedilink
    38
    edit-2
    8 months ago

    Those targeted ads aren’t messing around

    Edit: Personally I’ve already got an urn picked out for me. A probably too large coffee can of my favorite coffee brand.

    I’d prefer it not get used for my ashes for at least a few more decades though.

  • @CoffeeJunkie
    link
    368 months ago

    Graveyards are a waste of space & good land. Land is for the living. Cremation is the way; it is clean, responsible, & considerate.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      208 months ago

      . I’d rather be harvested for any useful organs if I have any left healthy enough to save someone, then the rest of me thrown in some kind of corpse compost or bio reactor or something.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          118 months ago

          For every person like you there may be a person like me that couldn’t care less to visit a grave. I can remember my fallen ones from anywhere.

          Don’t want to sound callous but if you’re dead you’re dead to me too, like it’s a part of life. Just accept it and move on. I’m gonna die one day whoop whoop.

          • @Carnelian
            link
            87 months ago

            Maybe as a compromise, then, the people who care can do the thing and the people who don’t don’t have to?

            • @[email protected]
              link
              fedilink
              67 months ago

              Sure, but if the argument is that graveyards take to much valuable space that could be used to house living humans.

              Perhaps people should keep ashes in their own gardens etc and you can alsways go and do the things you do.

              To be transparent, this isn’t something I have given a lot of thought to until I saw this thread.

              • @Carnelian
                link
                37 months ago

                Suppose so, I feel like they’re pretty low on the list of land we could reclaim tho. Would rather go after golf courses first for example

                • @[email protected]
                  link
                  fedilink
                  47 months ago

                  Oh I agree that golf courses would be a priority. The same for office blocks where people can work from home.

                  I’m with mark twain on golf, it’s a good walk spoiled 😂

              • 𝔼𝕩𝕦𝕤𝕚𝕒
                link
                3
                edit-2
                7 months ago

                Something I think I’ve seen in movies (mostly ones implied to be ancient japan) is a family grave. A single pillar driven into the ground with the family name and then everyone is cremated or something. Notable individuals for the family get a pillar next to it, but this could be a solution as first world countries reach the point where space is a premium. This allows families to mourn recently, and not-so-recently deceased.

                Cyberpunk has the Columbariums - huge columns of thousands of cremated individuals, with a digital display for your Epitaph and name

                • @[email protected]
                  link
                  fedilink
                  17 months ago

                  The uk had 3500 cemeteries in 1914 and more have been built since. A a report in 2013 said that nearly half would be out of space by 2033.

                  I wouldn’t like to say how much land this accounts for but just in my small town you could build hundreds of houses or even more apartments on all the land.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          17 months ago

          Yes, it’s also called Natural Organic Reduction or terramation. This would be my dream.

          When I die compost my body and use the compost on a tree in the garden or spread it in a natural reserve. This way if my relative want to visit my grave they go in nature rather than going in a gray cemetery full of concrete.

      • VulKendov
        link
        fedilink
        17 months ago

        If you don’t have any useful organs, I imagine you can still be used as a cadaver for medical students.

    • @cosmicrookie
      link
      108 months ago

      I’d like my ashes to go into a firework and be spread out all over my local area. Go out with a bang!

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        English
        67 months ago

        If they didn’t pump the bodies full of toxic chemicals and store them indefinitely in a piece of furniture, maybe.

        • @Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In
          link
          27 months ago

          Good points.

          I will specify organs donated and Eco friendly coffin without embalming.

          • @[email protected]
            link
            fedilink
            English
            37 months ago

            I’m leaning towards one of those fungus suits, hopefully with a mango tree planted atop.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    22
    edit-2
    8 months ago

    I don’t care what happens to my corpse, because I’ll be dead then. Never understood, why people still care nowadays, religion I guess.

    • hrimfaxi_work
      link
      fedilink
      English
      17 months ago

      Ritual and ceremony are deeply important aspects of the human experience. What cultures do with their dead is way, way up there with foodways and adornment when it comes to cultural significance.

      The increasingly common view in the West that elaborate death rites are unimportant is really new when compared to the rest of human history. It’s probably a postmodern thing? If I’m right about that, that would mean the less reverential attitude towards traditional deatg ceremony is like 110ish years old.

      Compared to the 200,000-300,000 years Homo Sapiens have been around (or 45,000 years ago if we only want to discuss the length of time that Northern European-style deathways have most likely been practiced), 100 years isn’t a lot to change that cultural inertia.

      Sorry, I know this is a Wendy’s. Just a frosty, thanks.

      • @jwelch55
        link
        127 months ago

        You can have the ceremony without being ripped off for thousands of dollars on a box nobody will ever see again

      • volvoxvsmarla
        link
        fedilink
        57 months ago

        Why the fuck have you been downvoted, that’s just a reasonable comment.

        May I also point out, your funeral isn’t for you. You might not care what happens to your body but your close ones do. A funeral is a place for them to find closure, to grief and mourn your loss. The mere fact that people who cannot retrieve their lost one’s body feel awfully about it and still tend to create empty graves should show how much this is a very old desire of importance. The way we perform these death rituals can change and maybe it is not about how a body is being get rid off per se, and surely we could change this. That we as a species are aware of what death means and have found ways to cope with it (i.e. rituals as a coping way to deal with the knowledge) is incredible.

        Whenever people say something along these lines of “just throw me in the trash” it feels to me like they didn’t get that point. It’s not about you. It’s about everyone else.

        • hrimfaxi_work
          link
          fedilink
          English
          26 months ago

          Hey there! FYI I really appreciated this comment. The response to my comment here convinced me that Lemmy isn’t really the place for me. I popped back today to look something up, and I wanted to make sure you got a friendly hello after seeing your response.

          I totally agree with everything you said. Having shared practices for remembrance and an established “typical” way to demonstrate care for deceased people is a significant part of maintaining social cohesion and so useful for giving individuals an outlet for grief.

          The way an entire industry has emerged to capitalize on loss and paij sickens me, but that part is a whole different conversation.

          My education is in archaeoligy, and my primary interest was American deathways. I’ve probably spent more time thinking about contemporary death rites and remembrance than I’ve thought about anything else as an adult.

          Anyway, I hope you’re well! Keep on being a cool person.

          • volvoxvsmarla
            link
            fedilink
            16 months ago

            This was such a nice reply, thank you, it really made my day (probably even two days). How sad that lemmy lost you, but I think I get it. It’s not 100% my vibe either. Maybe one day it will change in a way that makes you want to try it out again. I’m probably typing this into a void but just in case you pop in again you, as well, deserve a friendly hello.

            And I really hope you pop back in because frankly, having an archeologist who specialized in deathways is super interesting. I imagine you have so many things to tell. How are American deathways different from other cultures? What stands out? How did Native Americans influence the settling Europeans, and vice versa? Was there any influence to begin with? How did it change over time? What is the most heartfelt detail about how the dead were/are handled that might be special to that culture, in your opinion? What is the most grotesque aspect? How has your studies influenced how you view death itself, and how has it influenced your view on funerals? What would you do if you emigrated into a vastly different culture (in regards to last wishes etc)? What are the most common misconceptions, fun facts, and what touched you the most? And why exactly did you end up specializing in such a field anyway?

            I realize I’m probably asking these questions into a void, but man, should you ever be back here - let me know how I can read up on your work, ok?

            You remind me of a PhD candidate I met when working for theater and he was writing his thesis on Russian folklore fairy tales, and told me that he noticed a pattern of a circular repetition of themes in each story. I wish I remembered his name and were able to look up what he published, but I don’t, and it saddens me that I missed out on such an interesting topic that I would have wanted to know more about. It seems like I will miss out once more. (Hey, is that a circular repeat?)

  • @Snapz
    link
    198 months ago

    Casket+ includes a lid! Only $59.99/hour (surge pricing if used between hours of 10pm and 8am)

    Don’t you love your dead relatives? Or are you cheap?

  • BoofStroke
    link
    fedilink
    English
    178 months ago

    Cremation. Tubes for ashes. Instructions to friends and family where to toss me and maybe plant a tree.

    • Pennomi
      link
      English
      148 months ago

      I want my remains spread at the happiest place on Earth, Disneyland.

      Also, I don’t want to be cremated.

  • @Wrench
    link
    128 months ago

    Sky burial. Just chop me up and feed me to the vultures

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      38 months ago

      What can you invest with $22 per month (or $264 per year) that’s actually turned a noticable profit? Even at 10% return you’d be looking at $26.4 gain per year.

        • VulKendov
          link
          fedilink
          17 months ago

          Its a payment plan to buy to casket. You $20 a month for $60 months.

    • @DarylDutch
      link
      English
      37 months ago

      It is, Grave plots are temporary.

  • @MrQuallzin
    link
    108 months ago

    My grandpa handmade his coffin with some really nice walnut. Quilted the inside I believe. He’s still kicking, so it gets used as a prop at Halloween