Let’s start with a big-ass “H”!
The past is the past, surely more letters will fit in the same space!
Amateurs. Never put a date on your rapture predictions. Just say it is happening soon.
Better yet, if you get enough people to listen to you, start saying you’re Jesus.
totally not cult behavior
Thank god there is no ninth of hexadecember, so no worries.
Maybe this in Julian calendar?!
That means we only have 247 years left!! REPENT!!
Can’t I fuck off for 246 days and repent the day of? I mean, I just bought this bag of coke and another one of oxy. D:
My favorite month in the dual-year. Junetobuary.
It’s almost 9pm where I am and there’s no sign of it. Jesus better hurry his ass up if he wants to be on time.
Maybe everyone around you is a filthy sinner.
Maybe that’s been the joke for centuries. The rapture happened but nobody made the cut. Seems consistent with the Bible.
We are living in the apocalypse, but nobody told us
In hindsight, there may have been signs…
Maybe they’re the filthy sinner and got left behind
Oh if the rapture people’s idea of god is the right one, I’m definitely not getting into heaven. But that’s ok, heaven would be full of people I’d never want to hang out with anyway.
19th here, I think I got left behind.
It’s happening on the 9th of 18th month, we’ve still got some time.
But of that day and hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.
Matthew 24:36.
RTFM, noob.
“Read The Fisherman Matthew”?
Read the fucking moom
Ride turtles for money
Ready Tortellini Featuring Mushrooms
Ride the Frigging Mmmrobot
Does this imply that the rapture won’t happen on any day any man or angel predicted it, and suggest that these crackpots are either delivering a “no rapture today” message from the Lord Almighty or else embarrassing Her into putting it off?
Reginald, The Fingerless Mittens!
RTFB
Hi guys, its the 19th here in Australia already and I can confirm that I have been Left Behind to suffer heck on earth for being a sinner and Im super over it already.
You sure everybody got raptured and you’re not just in Australia?
Nah mate, that’s just fuckin Thursdy.
Aw fuckin’ hell!
ahhh cheer up mate, its friday tomorow, fuckin pissup day!
Mate, Im doing cashies for a bloke all long weekend, 6am starts, Im bloody spewing. Reckon he’ll sling me a block of piss though, so she’ll be right.
Fricking heck
Party time!
Everyone is dead. Everyone except us.
Jesus better fucking come I’ve been jerking him off for like 20 minutes
Jesus, King of the Edging!
It’s currently September 19th
Dude, you’re already part god. You don’t get to be raptured.
I also don’t want to go to work
Good news: you don’t have to! You may end up losing your job and eating out of a dumpster, but you don’t have to.
It’s true. I’m getting raptured right n
Well, well, well. Look who became a gentile and got themselves raptured.
Okay, you got me, I’m still stuck here with all of you heretics
Liar! Sinner! You should be raptured immediately!
I think the “good people” are the ones who get raptured, but I’m really not sure.
….demon!
Don’t mix my apostate ass with those heretics
I MISSED IT!?
No, they neglected to put the first part of the year, it’s happening in 2124.
Whew ok… Just 100 more years and I can learn to rap
9-18-249-19-249-20-249-21-249-22-24I mean…if they keep this up they will be right eventually…right?
Like my wife, every day for 17 years, “That tree is going to fall down.”
Tree falls down.
“I told you so.”
LMFAO
Why is 2038 missing?
Because it most likely won’t end humanity.
They were always right about the date. They just were wrong about what Jesus is looking for.
They may have screwed up their ISO date format. They really mean it’ll happen on the 9th day of the 18th month of 2024.
It tracks
Never mind the old flippediroo of the day and month. What I want to know is why is there a dash in front of the date. I thought the separators went between the things to be separated.
Not again
Afraid so. Hope you enjoy the great snatch.
sigh - Days without thinking about her: 0
the lady in the red dress?
Phenomenal snatch.
(snatch is a euphemism for vagina)
The rapture is when we all get vacuumed back up into Eve’s vagina, so it works.
Probably better than going back into Adam’s balls.
From snatch you came, and to snatch you shall return.
What happens if you have a Sinful Thought during “The Great Snatch”? Do you get un-Snatched? What if you immediately Repent? Do you get Snatched again? Will there be people bouncing back and forth indefinitely?
so nobody can know the date of the rapture, and if someone figures it out god’ll change it?
what if I make a website that just says “the rapture will be [current date +1]”
checkmate?
nonsense, there are only 12 months
