• @PunnyName
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    223 hours ago

    There’s no prior authorization for thoughts and prayers.

  • Chozo
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    504 hours ago

    We’ve received your request for additional sympathy. Our advanced AI systems will now determine your claim’s eligibility.

    Oh, sorry, looks like it’s been denied.

  • @foggy
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    554 hours ago

    Demanding sympathy is the height of pity.

    Pathetic. Maybe figure out why no one has any sympathy for the guy.

    • bizarroland
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      253 hours ago

      “I demand you respect me!” said the person who is fundamentally undeserving of respect

      • @[email protected]
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        128 minutes ago

        CEOs spotted all over the country in empty grocery store parking lots yelling “I’m a grown-ass man!” to nobody around.

  • @WoodScientist
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    654 hours ago

    Brian Robert Thompson murdered 51,000 innocent human beings.

      • @WoodScientist
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        123 hours ago

        It is a reasonable first order estimate. See a comment here. I think I will organize this a bit better and make a blog post on this tomorrow. But suffice to say, 51,000 is a good baseline number, based on UHC’s share of the private insurance market and the length of Thompson’s tenure as CEO of UHC. It could be as high as 100,000. But really, at this scale, it ceases to matter. You can only really comprehend it in comparative terms. And his number of victims was order of magnitude greater than that of Osama Bin Ladin.

      • TerkErJerbs
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        113 hours ago

        I’m no math wizard but I’ve read 68k people die per year from preventable shit due to denied claims. Brian worked at United since 2004, CEO since 2021 so he contributed directly or indirectly to that number of deaths per year, at least the portion United is responsible for. United has double the industry average of rejected claims.

        It’s def higher than OP states.

  • @aeronmelon
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    194 hours ago

    Thank you for needing the working class to exist. We have received and reviewed your request for sympathy towards your continued indifference to human suffering. Unfortunately we must reject your claim…

  • @UnderpantsWeevil
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    134 hours ago

    The persecution complex is going to get even more people killed as CEOs grow more paranoid and bodyguards more trigger happy.