• @DanglingFury
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    1 year ago

    “this simple meal only requires about 5 minutes of prep work”

    Proceeds* to list off atleast half an hours worth of shit to do prior to cooking

  • @JimVanDeventer
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    1231 year ago

    Step 1: Unwrap processed cheese slice and put in mouth. Repeat as necessary.

  • @xantoxis
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    1 year ago

    [Camera fade in on a full-body shot of me standing in my kitchen, my hands tented smartly in front of me.]

    Hi everyone, welcome back to my food channel. You don’t want to cook a full balanced meal every night, sometimes you just want something quick! So today I wanted to show everyone my go-to lazy meal.

    [I rip open a bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips with my teeth and just start pouring them vertically into my mouth. Many of the chocolate chips do not go into my mouth, they just fall straight down, bouncing off the floor and out of frame. Some get caught in the folds of my clothing, occasionally rolling off onto the floor and bouncing out of frame. Most unsettling are the ones that fall into my mouth and then are carried out again by their own chaotic momentum, covered in microscopic flecks of my saliva, sticking to my shirt or splattering on the floor.]

    [This continues for much longer than you’d think, as I empty the entire 1-pound bag without stopping.]

    [I release the empty plastic bag, which drifts to the floor. The camera zooms in on my eyes, where tears are just starting to be visible. Fade out.]

  • @[email protected]
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    621 year ago

    Y’all are way too productive…

    And lazy doesn’t necessarily mean quick either. Frozen pizza has gotta be the real winner here.

    • @hydrospanner
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      151 year ago

      After it gets translucent, add a knife-tip’s worth of minced garlic from the jar… Some salt and pepper.

      From there you’re making anything from soup to pasta to breakfast to Mexican, Asian, Italian…

    • Zeppo
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      61 year ago

      I think this person is upset that other people are less lazy about cooking in general than he is

      • @[email protected]
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        11 year ago

        Not really, he is just explaining that some veggies add a lot of taste for very little effort. People watch cooking programmes and think that you have to spend an hour cutting stuff up to make it worthwhile. Or that you have to spend a fortune on herbs to make it taste nice. When the reality is that just adding a single vegetable can do wonders for the taste. Onions are just the most versatile and one of the quickest to prep/cook.

        • Zeppo
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          1 year ago

          Almost everything sauteed or simmered starts out with at least onions, sure. I interpreted it, though, as “this person saying he takes no effort but they’re chopping vegetables and cooking something vs throwing some stuff in the microwave”. Hard to know with no context.

    • gordon
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      41 year ago

      Grilled cheese, chicken and/or cheese quesadilla, butter-noodles, tomato soup, hot dogs / brats, etc.

        • gordon
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          1 year ago

          All except the grilled cheese, because then it’s a fucking melt you donkey

  • HobbitFoot
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    411 year ago

    I got this great lazy spaghetti snack recipe.

    1. Take out some pieces of spaghetti from the box.
    2. Eat it.
  • @ChicoSuave
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    1 year ago

    Real lazy meal? Uncooked top ramen, the cheaper the better.

    Recipe:

    1. Smash ramen noodles

    2. Open bag

    3. Pour seasoning into bag of broken noodles

    Congrats, you have ramen chips.

    • PlasterAnalyst
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      171 year ago

      Yeah, but first you have to dip your pinky in the seasoning and taste it like a tv cop testing drugs.

    • @[email protected]
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      91 year ago

      Huh interesting. Here in Hong Kong there’s a snack that is exactly that. It’s basically the exact same thing as ramen, but it’s meant to be eaten directly out of the bag and the seasoning is already mixed in.

      • @[email protected]
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        71 year ago

        Reminds me of those old bay goldfish that PF sold for a little bit last year. I admit, my purchases of cheddar goldfish and old bay have been up since that event.

        • @[email protected]
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          11 year ago

          I bought a bag of those at a grocery store in Texas. Ended up throwing a good portion of the bag away. They were pretty awful.

    • @WhiskyTangoFoxtrot
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      51 year ago

      Gotta hold the bag closed and shake it up after you pour the seasoning in.

  • @gmtom
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    281 year ago

    This is why we in the UK, the King’s of lazy food, have perfected the art of the “picky tea” slap two kind of beige food on a baking tray, shove it in the oven for 15-20 minutes at 200°, big dolop of your preferred dipping sauce on the side, or some baked beans if you’re feeling lush, lovely jubbly.

    • @ohlaph
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      31 year ago

      15-20 minutes? Who has time for that?

      • @gmtom
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        41 year ago

        Things like fish fingers, chicken dippers, turkey dinosaurs, hash browns, potato waffles, even chips.

    • El Barto
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      11 year ago

      I understood some of those words!

  • @[email protected]
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    251 year ago

    I don’t mind the chopping, washing and cleaning up is the dealbreaker for actually cooking for a lazy meal.

    My lazy hot meal is usually something with noodles or rice, like jar sauce bolognese or egg rice. Bonus if you eat it straight out of the pot.

    • @[email protected]
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      31 year ago

      I just clean while I cook. Some things barely require more cleaning than a quick wipe and rinse with a drop of soap, like a knife or cutting board.

    • @STUPIDVIPGUY
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      1 year ago

      fuck it, frozen meatballs and spaghetti-os time

      replace spaghetti-os with chili or whatever tf else you find in your pantry

    • @Aux
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      -11 year ago

      Just put everything into a dish washer.

    • @shadowspirit
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      51 year ago

      Sagan is missed. Really enjoyed watching the Cosmos series. Something about the way he speaks and his anecdotes…rare person who can communicate to any audience

  • @instamat
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    191 year ago

    Fr, if it involves that much prep then it’s officially gourmet

  • @[email protected]
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    181 year ago

    This will potentially sound disgusting, but yesterday i chopped a red onion, broke off a 20cm piece of sausage and ate them with 2 pieces of bread for lunch. Couldn’t even deny I’m from Hungary🤣

    • Zeppo
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      51 year ago

      Seems pretty normal to me. I snack on stuff like that though I’d probably have some mustard, mayo or hot sauce with it.