• Smuuthbrane
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    2666 months ago

    Anarchist answer: They’re both unisex - bees for pees, birds for turds.

  • Smuuthbrane
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    1836 months ago

    Bees have a stinger, and “bird” has been a slang term for a woman (like, what, 1920-1950s?).

    Regards, I agree that’s needlessly vague, and just about to the point of useless.

    • @[email protected]
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      226 months ago

      Wtf

      Alternate comment: I love how you need to internalize 100 years of sexism before you can relieve yourself

      • @shalafi
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        146 months ago

        Harmless old slang terms are now sexist. Got it.

        • Maven (famous)
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          -76 months ago

          I’m pretty sure it was sexist back then too. It’s just that nobody cared.

            • Maven (famous)
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              -16 months ago

              Interesting. I didn’t know the words origins. I’ve always considered it alongside the classic English tradition of referring to women as various animals.

              • @[email protected]
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                66 months ago

                This isnt a uniquely female experience. Men commonly refer to their friends as “dog”. Also, in the gay community, men’s body types are equated to animals such as “bear,” “otter,” and “cub”.

      • Smuuthbrane
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        186 months ago

        You’re using logic in a situation where someone has to pee badly.

    • Ekky
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      106 months ago

      Thank you for the explanation.

      As someone not too familiar with American cultures, I’d probably make an assumption and go for the (to me) more masculine bird over the docile and flower loving bee, since bees have stingers that they normally would never use and birds have beaks/peckers.

      • VaultBoyNewVegas
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        236 months ago

        I’ve only ever heard bird used as working class slang for a woman in Britain.

        • Ekky
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          26 months ago

          Hmm, well, I have heard women being compared to singing birds (or more degrading as vultures or pen of hens if in group), but I’ve more often heard women being romantically compared to bees or flowers. Though, I don’t think I’ve ever heard men being compared to bees, but often to birds (eagles, vultures, seagulls, etc.).

          Might also be local culture, as I usually think of harmony, nature, and perhaps matriarchy when pondering bees, while birds seem much more gender neutral, like, standoff-ish, elegant, brutal, impulsive, egoistic, even presented as predatory and evil in children movies and some media.

          So, using common stereotyping, you can see where I’m coming from.

        • Smuuthbrane
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          16 months ago

          Maybe that’s where I heard it? Dunno, it’s certainly not current by any stretch.

    • Bob
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      46 months ago

      Odd that so many people are coming out the woodwork to say they didn’t know Britons fairly often call women birds.

      • @[email protected]
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        46 months ago

        I’ve heard dame used more often than bird myself. Honestly, not sure I’ve actually heard bird used… it’s like a vague sense of “I think I knew that… right?” and my brain shrugs back.

        • @[email protected]
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          26 months ago

          It’s slang you’d hear 50 years ago in the east end and Essex. You’ll only really hear it used by gangsters in movies these days or someone putting on the accent for laughs, possibly from an old geezer, you certainly won’t hear it used by respectable establishments or family friendly media. It’s not generally considered offensive but is considered uncouth.

  • @[email protected]
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    1216 months ago

    Find a member of staff and ask where the “human bathrooms” are. Don’t let them leave until they explain. Bonus points if you piss your pants while they are trying to explain.

    • @radicalautonomy
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      486 months ago

      Look them intensely in the eye as piss streams down your leg to establish dominance.

      • @trxxruraxvr
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        146 months ago

        Better piss on their leg to mark your territory

    • Flying SquidM
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      6 months ago

      “Excuse me sir/madam, I am looking for the human bathroom as I need to pour out some liquid from inside of my body through my urethra, something we humans normally do.”

      • @PunnyName
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        106 months ago

        One of the most uncomfortable episodes.

        • @samus12345
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          116 months ago

          I had to look it up. Am I correct in thinking this was a transphobic episode?

          • @PunnyName
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            136 months ago

            Kinda. But it gets fucking crazy. Mr Garrison gets surgery to be trans fem. Kyle gets taller, black skin, and Mr Garrison’s testicles as his new knees. Gerald becomes a dolphin. It’s all over the place.

            Matt and Trey use the writing technique of “but, therefore” which leads to very insane story threads (with their ribald thinking)

            https://youtube.com/watch?v=j9jEg9uiLOU

          • @[email protected]
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            86 months ago

            Southpark makes fun of literally every and anything, so yeah it could be considered transphobic lol. Just keep in mind the intention is to be gross, over the top, nonsensical, etc…

            • @[email protected]
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              26 months ago

              I hate the excuse of “making fun of everything”

              Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.

              • @[email protected]
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                26 months ago

                Eh, life is short, might as well find humor in things, if we tip toed around everything anyone could possibly get offended for, the world would be a pretty bleak place.

                • @[email protected]
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                  16 months ago

                  Humor isn’t harmless, you are affecting the quality of life of minorities if you punch down on them for no reason.

          • @[email protected]
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            86 months ago

            This one might have been, but a few seasons later you have “The Cissy”, probably the most trans-supportive episode they made.

            • @SkyezOpen
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              16 months ago

              South Park is always “edgy” in the safest way. Climate change was widely ridiculed when they made manbearpig, and the undertones of this one were definitely pretty bad. I give them a pass on mr/Mrs garrison because he’s always been a piece of shit much like cartman, but the message with Gerald and Kyle is “surgery doesn’t change who you really are.” It dropped in 2005 so… Product of the time I guess?

  • @gAlienLifeform
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    806 months ago

    Doesn’t matter, just wash you hands when you’re done

    • @expatriado
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      106 months ago

      don’t pee on the seat and flush would be my priorities

  • @RememberTheApollo_
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    666 months ago

    Slang for women is “chicks” and a bit more archaic, “birds” too.

    Bees have a…stinger? Dunno about that one.

    • @Gigan
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      256 months ago

      Aren’t most bees female though?

    • @theluckyone
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      6 months ago

      _prick /prĭk/ noun

      … A small, sharp, local pain, such as that made by a needle or bee sting … A pointed object, such as an ice pick, goad, or thorn. _

      • The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, 5th Edition

      Suppose calling men bees is more polite than calling them pricks…

  • @[email protected]
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    606 months ago

    Just look for the one with a line (queue) outside.

    Or be fair and pee half in each.

    Or be chaotic and scrawl “Mammals” on the wall and pee under that.

  • NoSpiritAnimal
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    556 months ago

    If you don’t have a cloaca you can’t use birds

      • @[email protected]
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        86 months ago

        Also male birds don’t lay eggs 🥚🥚

        And only the queen bee lays eggs, any bee out and foraging around is a sterile female.

        Isn’t it mostly just hummingbirds that would get involved with pollen? Or are there others?

      • Hellfire103
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        6 months ago

        To be honest, the gender binary makes even less sense for bees (as well as wasps, ants, hornets, termites, and other hive insects) than it does for humans.

        Hive insects have three sexes: queens (analogous to females), drones (analogous to males), and workers (which could be analogous to intersex people, but it doesn’t really translate into human biology).

    • @[email protected]
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      6 months ago

      I am shocked how few people know Georgia O’Keeffe’s paintings? Bees (females) going flower to flower, pollinating.

      I hope those are single user bathrooms. It just simplifies things.

    • @[email protected]
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      26 months ago

      Wow never actually got the meaning:

      According to tradition, “the birds and the bees” is a metaphorical story sometimes told to children in an attempt to explain the mechanics and results of sexual intercourse through reference to easily observed natural events. For instance, bees carry and deposit pollen into flowers, a visible and easy-to-explain parallel to fertilization. Female birds laying eggs is a similarly visible and easy-to-explain parallel to ovulation. Another interpretation of the bird laying the egg is childbirth, although that is not as common.

      PS: left the links in this time, on iOS usually have to copy to PasteBoard to get plain text - just started happening in Voyager

    • @PunnyName
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      116 months ago

      Especially in the microwave. Adds flavor.

  • @ParabolicMotion
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    416 months ago

    Why not just make every bathroom a one occupant room? Just because someone has the same genitals as me doesn’t mean I want them to hear me fart.

    • The Menemen!
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      6 months ago

      I once was in the restroom when my (then) boss (plus later doctor father) came to the toilet and farted as loudly as humanly possible. It was very satisfying. Happy that guy is not my boss anymore, he thought his scientific staff are his personal slaves.

        • The Menemen!
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          6 months ago

          The professor you write your PhD thesis at/with/for. Isn’t that a common word in English?

          • @[email protected]
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            36 months ago

            I have never written a PhD thesis, so I might not be the best representative, but it’s the first time I’ve heard the phrase.

            • @craigers
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              66 months ago

              Ditto for me on both counts. I was trying to figure out if he was your wifes dad who is also your MD or what. So doctor father is more like drag mother.

    • @zarathustrad
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      16 months ago

      That would be nice, for small venues that only have a few stalls. However that would take a ton of rooms and money for high traffic areas like stadiums, airports, and so on.

      Just make a big trough and make new friends.

    • @bitwaba
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      -136 months ago

      Because men piss on the seat, and women get pissy about piss on the seat.

      • NιƙƙιDιɱҽʂ
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        76 months ago

        It’s cute that you think women’s bathrooms aren’t an absolute train wreck.

        • @bitwaba
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          46 months ago

          Tell that to the women I work with that had us roll back the 12x gender neutral toilet stalls into 5x men + 5x female + 2x genger neutral. Top complaint was “using a stall after a man has used it is disgusting”. The second highest complaint was that it smells like someone poo’d in the toilet… which is a strange complaint for a toilet.

          • @acetanilide
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            26 months ago

            Would they rather the poop be out of the toilet? I am so confused lol

            Although I do agree. Using a stall after a man has used it is disgusting. Also, using a stall after anyone who is not a man has used it is disgusting. (But only if they don’t keep it clean)

      • @[email protected]
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        66 months ago

        There’s a reason the seats are liftable. It’s to lift before you piss and if you pissed on the rim, then just use the nearby faucet to wash it down, then drop the seat back down when leaving.
        The problem is not men, but people who don’t think of the next person using the thingy.

        I was in a hostel for multiple years and I used to was the toilet before and after the deed.

        Anti Commercial-AI license

      • @iopq
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        46 months ago

        You should still have the standing to piss area elsewhere

      • @Leviathan
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        36 months ago

        I went to a restaurant this week where the washroom was just one big room with full door stalls and a full door room the size of two stalls with a few urinals in it. No fear of pissing on the seat of you use a urinal. Also, just lift the seat?

        • @bitwaba
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          26 months ago

          You’re preaching to the chior. Try convincing the rest of the men in the world that they also can.

      • @[email protected]
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        26 months ago

        LOL, I worked on a construction site. The men sat for their business or used the funnel on the wall, the women hovered and wet the seat

  • @[email protected]
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    396 months ago

    Bees for pees, birds for tuds.

    Can’t remember who originally said that but it had me creasing.

    • @SlothMama
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      56 months ago

      That reminds me of stingers for strings and wings for flings.

      Used to hear it all the time got me cut up like what.

    • @EvilEyedPanda
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      96 months ago

      Birds also poop out the seeds they eat that helps spread them, while bees rub themselves all over the flower, covering themselves with pollen before moving on to the next flower.

      Not sure that helps answer the question, though.

      • @cokeslutgarbage
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        26 months ago

        Oh, so I’m def a bee… I don’t know what that means for these signs tho.

  • Queen HawlSera
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    316 months ago

    I seriously don’t know what the hell the “Birds and the bees” even refers to beyond an olde movie cliche.

  • @saltesc
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    6 months ago

    OP’ was actually meant to take a left, but instead got lost in the back corridors of the local zoo. Regardless of the which door they chose, it ended with a senior first aid officer and a school group being traumatised.

    • @A_Random_Idiot
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      176 months ago

      Thats a little to common sense for the average American.

      I’d wager bees are boys, for bathroom purposes, cause boys have a “stinger”

      • Flying SquidM
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        136 months ago

        Maybe this isn’t in America.

        That said, if it was in the UK, ‘birds’ would be for women, so the result would be the same.

      • AbsentBird
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        6 months ago

        I think it’s a play on words Bees -> Bs, B stands for Boy. Birds -> British slang for women.

        • @iopq
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          66 months ago

          Birds -> Bs, B stands for Boy…

          • AbsentBird
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            26 months ago

            I mean that if you say “Bees” out loud it sounds like “B’s”, as in the boy’s room.

            • @iopq
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              66 months ago

              I actually got that after I read my own post

              But it did remind me of the joke that Quebec labels the cold water with C for cold and hot water with C for chaud

      • JoshCodes
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        26 months ago

        Same thought different reasoning: the expression “a bees dick” exists. There’s no equivalent for birds.

        • @Azteh
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          76 months ago

          A birds pecker?

            • @RedAggroBest
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              26 months ago

              Meanwhile I’ve never heard “a bee’s dick” in my life.

              • JoshCodes
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                16 months ago

                My favourite use is to suggest a near miss: the other car missed the cyclist by a bees dick.

        • @[email protected]
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          16 months ago

          Well, there is the fact that “bird” is itself slang for both penis and woman, though of course in the case of the latter it is antiquated enough to be considered offensive (of course, since as I’m informed the only inoffensive ways to refer to those who identify as belonging to the gender traditionally known as the “not male” gender are “girls” for those under 18 and “women” for those above, the offensiveness of this term is perhaps expected.)

      • BlanketsWithSmallpox
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        -16 months ago

        average American… for bathroom purposes,… boys have a “stinger”

        Exhibit A!