• @[email protected]
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    13511 months ago

    The original game as invented by bored semi-drunk Scots was, I’m sure, a good laugh several hundred years ago with wee sticks and a random round thing.

    The modern game and all its hideous capitalist/ classist cultural connotations is fucked.

    • gibs
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      211 months ago

      I have it on good authority that golf was in fact invented by Bandrobas Took during the Battle of Greenfields.

    • @LemmyIsFantastic
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      8 months ago

      🙄 modern home is just as accessible as any sport that requires gear eg hockey. Even more so. You folks just looking for enemies.

    • @Aux
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      -19111 months ago

      Tell me that you’re poor without telling me that you’re poor.

      • @dorron
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        11811 months ago

        Tell me you’re an asshole without telling me you’re an asshole.

      • Flying SquidM
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        6511 months ago

        How dare someone be poor! Anyone who makes that choice is doing it to be offensive!

      • @mriormro
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        4311 months ago

        Why does it matter if they’re poor or not?

        • Flying SquidM
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          4311 months ago

          Didn’t you know? If you’re poor, you’re supposed to be ashamed of it because it means you didn’t try hard enough to not be poor.

        • @hydrospanner
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          611 months ago

          Basically what they’re really saying here is that anyone with money would agree with them and have no issues with the negative impacts of golf because it’s something that all financially well-off people enjoy. Therefore, if you have any issue with golf in any way, it must be because you don’t have the money to enjoy it, because every single person that ever lived is in love with golf, and the only reason anyone might have for not golfing is lack of funds.

          Of course the nonsense needs no explanation, but that’s the angle they were going for, and why they’re rightly being ridiculed for it.

      • @[email protected]
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        2811 months ago

        For someone who spends so much time talking about growing up in poverty, this is a surprisingly callous thing to say.

      • @[email protected]
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        1311 months ago

        tell me you’re a classist prick with more money than sense, oh no, wait, you’ve already done so.

  • @Krotz
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    7511 months ago

    Well, I recently learned of the existence of Excel competitions, so I’m not sure about the ‘most boring’ part.

  • @paddirn
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    6311 months ago

    Mini-golf is actually kind of fun.

    • Cosmic Cleric
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      1011 months ago

      Mini-golf is actually kind of fun.

      It’s a lot of fun, and you don’t need any nukes to enjoy it either.

        • Cosmic Cleric
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          511 months ago

          Maybe not need…

          True enough.

          There’s always that one hole where you have to hit the ball hard enough so it goes around the vertical loop ramp but not too hard so that it then bounces at the right angle to get anywhere near the area of the hole that’s blocked by a whole bunch of strategically placed pieces of wood.

          On that hole I would consider using a nuke.

        • Cosmic Cleric
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          211 months ago

          The mini-golf nuclear proliferation organization has spoken.

    • @Cringe2793
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      611 months ago

      Mini golf is superior and should be the default golf. As in, it shouldn’t have a descriptor. It should just be called golf.

      And what is called golf now should be called big golf or field golf or something like that to show how nonsensical it is.

    • @[email protected]
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      311 months ago

      Most of the times I played it, my group is enjoying themselves on holes 1-5, is getting tired of being held up by the group in front of us for holes 6-12, and is getting noticeably bored by hole 13, but feel like we have to finish it. It’s a game that starts fun and becomes obligation.

  • @[email protected]
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    6011 months ago

    Wait until you hear about the laws in place that guarantee them access to water their fields no matter the drought. Nobody has heard of an unkempt golf course.

  • Cyborganism
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    5611 months ago

    Not just that, but I found a few golf courses in my city where natural habitats used to be. These place could have easily been changed into nature parks for the local residents to go wind down a bit, but noooOOOooo. Some rich assholes had to buy the land and destroy the ecosystem so they could whack a ball around some fucking grass into a little hole.

    • @Tangent5280
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      111 months ago

      Would there be a difference to the sport if a part of the land was just left natural? I expect it would make the sport more interesting, atleast to the spectators.

      • Cyborganism
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        311 months ago

        It was invented in Scotland. Where there’s grass everywhere and almost no trees. Why not just play in natural landscapes that are suited for the game?

    • @[email protected]
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      2211 months ago

      I’m always interested in this take. By definition,.it’s clearly a sport.

      How do you define sport and how does it not meet the definition? It’s a game of physical skill, mental concentration, and competition.

      • @[email protected]
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        011 months ago

        I have always viewed it as a sport involves and active defensive player and an overall greater level of physical movement

        • @AA5B
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          3611 months ago

          What about non-team sports, like running, cycling, surfing, skiing, etc. maybe there’s a defensive strategy but there’s no active defensive player. Are those also not sports?

            • BlanketsWithSmallpox
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              -211 months ago

              Not really. They meet your qualifier of greater amount of physical activity/movement.

              Sport has connotations of fast paced physical activity.

              Games like Solitaire and Golf can be done by yourself and for most people won’t be spiking your heart levels to a runners high.

        • @[email protected]
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          1711 months ago

          Motorsports have no defensive player and do not involve much physical movement (unless you count the car’s movement).

          Giving a cat a bath involves a defensive player (the cat) and significant physical movement (depends on the cat’s mood).

          • @somethingsnappy
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            911 months ago

            Giving the cat a bath (other than the weird one I had that loved water) is classified as a blood sport.

          • @zeppo
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            211 months ago

            Part of the definition of a sport is that it accomplishes absolutely nothing useful at all, other than entertainment, thought about it and perhaps fitness. Bathing a cat is not a sport because it actually has a useful goal, I.e. cleaning a cat.

            • @[email protected]
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              311 months ago

              I would say that getting healthier and fitter is absolutely useful, and so is entertainment.

              But anyways, some sports can be useful for training purposes (Ever heard of the Firefighter Olympics? It’s really cool).

              Also there’s also stuff like people jogging/biking to go places, and sailing maybe can also fall into this category though I don’t think it’s a thing anymore. (IIRC in the 1700s there was a sort of sport where ships would race each other across the Atlantic to deliver stuff as fast as possible. Not sure though, take with grain of salt.)

              • @[email protected]
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                311 months ago

                There’s still people who sail to get to a destination. It’s a bit of a rich person thing, though. Even without a motor, boats are holes in the water that you sink money into. More so if it has to be ocean-going.

        • @AngryCommieKender
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          11 months ago

          Fishing has entered the chat.

          Definitely a defensive participant and an offensive participant, but way less physical activity like 90% of the time.

        • @ikidd
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          511 months ago

          You haven’t played golf with me. Better watch your balls as you have your legs open to swing.

    • @Godnroc
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      1611 months ago

      Where do you draw the line between sports and games? Are sports competitive where games are fun? Is poker a sport? Are video games capable of being sports? What could be done to golf that would make it a sport? Are all sports games if not all games are sports?

      These are the questions that keep me up at night.

      • @[email protected]
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        1411 months ago

        Not saying I hold this opinion myself but I think people that say this usually draw the line to physical exertion being required.

      • @[email protected]
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        11 months ago

        When I think of sport I think of anything where one sweats due to physical exertion.

        • @1847953620
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          411 months ago

          I sweat playing rocket league and working on my car, but they’re not sports.

      • @afraid_of_zombies
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        311 months ago

        If you can play it while drinking a beer it isn’t a sport.

      • @1847953620
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        511 months ago

        Good. They need to accept reality.

        • @[email protected]
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          511 months ago

          Oh that just made him angry, I always added that no sport has the winner of a major tournament in their mid 40s.

          • @hydrospanner
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            311 months ago

            I mean… Tom Brady was a super bowl MVP in his 40s.

            Chris Chelios won a Stanley Cup in his 40s.

            But your point is well taken nonetheless.

            • @[email protected]
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              211 months ago

              But that’s a team sport though. If we compare that to tennis the oldest tournament winner is Rosewall in the 70s at 37 years old and more recently Federer in 2018 at 36 years old.

          • @[email protected]
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            311 months ago

            Sports that are more based on endurance than sprinting tend to have older people who do well. Mid-40s is pushing it for championship level, but you can still be competitive at that stage, and still participate well into old age if you don’t have any major health/injury issues.

    • CashewNut 🏴󠁢󠁥󠁧󠁿
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      111 months ago

      I actually get exhausted playing golf - but that’s because I’m BAD at it. Apparently I put too much force into my swing. Every time I’ve tried to play I get told to relax and “let the club to the work”.

      So they literally have these weighted sticks to reduce the amount of frickin effort required to hit the ball.

      It’s not a sport. It’s an ANTI-sport. The less you try the better you’ll be.

      Can you imagine if we had an Olympic running sport to see who the slowest runner was? That’s what golf is. Get the weakest, limpest, vitamin-defficient humans and see how accurately they can hit a tiny ball into a hole.

      It was invented by the Scots as a joke against the English while they all go and compete in proper sports like caber tossing and hammer throwing.

      • @[email protected]
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        Or to keep it short, know that John Daly is one of the greats of the sport. Look up a picture of John Daly dated any time in the last 30 years, and you’ll know how hilarious that is.

        And people complain that Starcraft isn’t a sport.

      • @zeppo
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        111 months ago

        As much as assaulting fish is a sport. Much more reasonable and intellectual though

        • @interceder270
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          111 months ago

          I move my balls, but that’s a different story.

  • @[email protected]
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    4911 months ago

    The golf course near me has spent the last month about a foot underwater.

    I have never been so smug. I hope it’s ruined.

  • @[email protected]
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    4611 months ago

    every golf course could be a lovely botanical garden/park or arboretum, with little paths every which way and carefully crafted scenery to make you feel like you’re inside a disney movie

    • @[email protected]
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      11 months ago

      wpid-dgladeau_0113_0748

      You see this?

      I used to hike along the coast there quite regularly but someone decided it was much better to turn the whole thing into a gulf course and to illegally block access to locals.

      Edit: Of course they also chose the driest part of the island.

      • v_krishna
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        611 months ago

        Where is this? California has strict regulations about the actual beach access. So e.g. Pebble Beach is in one of the most beautiful locations in all of Northern California, ridiculously expensive and nearly impossible to play as a mortal, but you can still go drive around 17 mile drive through the course and walk along the coastal trails for free.

        • @[email protected]
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          411 months ago

          It’s in st Lucia in the Caribbean.

          There is regulations for beach access too here where all the coastline need to be accessible to the public.

          So far with this particular resort they are doing everything they can to discourage people from coming in and showed a strong disdain for the local community.

    • @[email protected]
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      11 months ago

      AND AFFORDABLE HOUSING ON EACH SIDE. Seattle estimated they could solve the housing crisis by closing a handful of their muni courses (leaving multiple municipal and a dozen private courses in the area) and building medium density housing there. Solving a critical need by getting rid of a few locations for a dying sport:

      https://www.theurbanist.org/2019/06/12/unlike-seattle-golf-really-is-dying/

      It’s a waste of space otherwise.

    • @[email protected]
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      11 months ago

      Most of the golf courses near me are pretty much this - densely forested areas with meticulously landscaped little gardens, which happens to have some holes built in.

      • StrikerOPM
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        11 months ago

        Please. For the love of God don’t let this lazy comment cliché migrate to here.

  • @[email protected]
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    11 months ago

    Las Vegas has something like 70 golf courses wasting inordinate amounts of water. Of course most houses also have outside private swimming pools too.

  • @Alterecho
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    4111 months ago

    As an environmentalist, fuck Kentucky bluegrass, fuck golf, and fuck lawns while we’re at it

  • @Death_Equity
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    2911 months ago

    I don’t care for golf and wish golf courses were better used spaces, but the thing about golf that makes it interesting is the meditative practice of being able to swing the club in just the right way to make the ball go where it needs to.

    I like archery and you have the same sort of thing going on there. You have to have your positioning, movements, focus, and smoothness of action to hit the target. You can tell how you failed before the arrow hits the target. Working on fine tuning your actions is enjoyable.

    • JackbyDev
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      211 months ago

      I shot in highschool and it was the same thing. I loved it. You get into this extreme zen state and.become hyper aware of your own body. It was a lot of fun.

    • @[email protected]
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      111 months ago

      archery

      archery doesn’t carry a racist history and waste giant tracts of land. they can putt-putt or get fucked.

    • Flying SquidM
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      -311 months ago

      They make driving ranges for that. They take up much less space.

      • @Death_Equity
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        1211 months ago

        It isn’t the same sort of thing though. Yes, you can pick a target and go for that, but having the topography and hazards makes for a different experience.

        Driving ranges also don’t have the same sort of socialization and competition aspect.

        • Flying SquidM
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          111 months ago

          I agree with the first thing you said, but there’s no reason why you can’t socialize or compete at a driving range. It would be the same sort of competition as an archery or shooting competition- how accurately can you hit your target? And driving ranges have all the people doing it parallel to each other, so there’s no reason why you can’t talk to the person next to you. Yes, it is not exactly the same as golf, but it’s more environmentally friendly and less of a barrier to people with lower income because you don’t have to pay country club fees.

          • @[email protected]
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            1311 months ago

            Fwiw golfers talk while they walk/cart around and such, and specifically are mad if anyone talks during their swing, the swing which is “the only thing you do at a driving range,” so talking is a little less accepted there.

  • Flying SquidM
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    2611 months ago

    I live in Indiana, so there’s (generally) no shortage of rain. The golf courses in this town still water the entire grass of the course every day. Even if it rained the day before. Even if it’s raining right then and there. There aren’t water shortages here, but what a waste.

    • @_danny
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      2311 months ago

      Most courses use man made ponds as both hazards and as retention ponds so they can use that rain water.

      You know what uses three times the amount of water per acre? Corn. And almonds use about ten times more water than corn. And people have only just started caring about lawns, that use two orders of magnitude more water, fertilizer, and land than golf courses.

      Golf courses really aren’t that bad from an ecological point of view when compared acre per acre to other large man made structures. They’re generally pretty small when compared to other large landscaping projects at 30-80 acres. The issue is when a city has like twenty courses just for the purpose of driving up housing prices.

      Would that land be better as a park? Probably, but this is the US, someone would see an unprofitable “empty” plot of land and throw million dollar houses on it.

      • @[email protected]
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        3111 months ago

        You know what uses three times the amount of water per acre? Corn. And almonds use about ten times more water than corn.

        And we get food out of that input, unlike a golf course where you get nothing of value.

        And people have only just started caring about lawns, that use two orders of magnitude more water, fertilizer, and land than golf courses.

        Have you seen a golf course before? They’re literally lawns.

        • @[email protected]
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          1011 months ago

          You get nothing of value from golf. I don’t play either so neither do I, but this very much comes off as “stop liking things I don’t like” rather than something that is actually important.

          • @AngryCommieKender
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            111 months ago

            At least in the southwestern US most of them are a moot point. The vast majority of golf courses are being redeveloped because the course went bankrupt over the last decade or so. A few are managing to stick around, but I wouldn’t be surprised if over 90% of the historical courses are gone in the next few years.

        • @_danny
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          111 months ago

          Most of the US corn crop goes to animal feed, so no you don’t get food from it. At least not directly. If you totaled up all of the land used by golf courses, you’d be at .1% of just the amount of land used for animal feed. And about 1% of the land used by home lawns.

          They’re not that bad, there are much worse enemies than golf courses in general. Again, courses that are in the middle of a city that do nothing but increase property value are terrible, but most are perfectly fine and use way less water than you think.

          • @zeppo
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            111 months ago

            Wtf do you think happens to those animals who eat the corn stalks?

      • Flying SquidM
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        111 months ago

        Well I admit I haven’t seen the entirety of those courses, but based on what I’ve seen, and considering they’re surrounded by either businesses, houses or, in one case, a hospital, I don’t know where those retention ponds would be. The hazards they have absolutely wouldn’t be big enough to cover the amount of water I see sprayed on them.

        • @_danny
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          411 months ago

          I have never seen a golf course next to a hospital… Maybe it’s regional, but near me, most courses have many made ponds that hold rain water and you can smell the pond water when the sprinklers come on. The ponds can hold several Olympic swimming pools worth of water.

      • @zeppo
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        011 months ago

        You’re really comparing growing food to some entirely useless recreation activity?

  • @[email protected]
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    2611 months ago

    I just don’t understand the need for so many courses, I played golf as a kid on the same one for 10 years, the local environment allowed it to maintain itself for the most part.

    • Cosmic Cleric
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      2011 months ago

      I hear nuclear armageddon is fun, too.

      What kind of parties are you going to?

    • @qarbone
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      611 months ago

      Eh, the OP is the one that made it a ratio of destruction to fun. Would have had the same impact if it said “Lunatics leveling miles of nature to thwhack a ball with a stick.” but they chose to make a value judgment on the fun quotient of golf.

    • @WhiteHawk
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      611 months ago

      Uh… is nuclear armageddon fun?

    • @Aceticon
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      111 months ago

      Well, that would very much depend on whether is a Mad Max style future or something else with fewer muscle cars…